My mom and her husband were functioning alcoholics and would drink heavily and fight almost every single day off (fri-sat, holidays) and occasional weekdays to spice things up from when I was 7 to around 24. I could come home from school and just feel the tension and know that there would be a +5 hour screaming match today. Then the next day, they would act as if nothing happened. I remember one time when I was around 9 years old during the summer holidays. They had been fighting for several hours multiple days in a row and I just remember thinking "I am just living with these people. They are not family".
No matter how much I would beg and cry, they would just keep going. They promised to be better, but nothing ever came of it. After a while, I just became resentful and stopped crying. I hated them deeply, especially my mother who I thought was neglecting her child for selfish reasons. She sacrificed me for her own whims and desires. She would often ask me why I was so angry all the time with her, as she had no clue as to why.
I felt constant stress over the fighting, never knowing when it would come, if they would separate and me and my mom would have to move, if friends were to drop by right in the middle of their arguments. Constant worrying over the future. It has affected me deeply, and I have a very hard time trusting people, social anxiety. If you feel your own mother neglects you, then what would stop anyone from being better? I hate conflict, arguing and any sort of attention, I just want to be left alone. I don't really care about anything and feel that all the things I was dreaming of as a child (good job, living by myself, having money) would fix my problems, but you soon realize that nothing can fill the void.
I moved out 3 years ago, but still live close by. I see them weekly and have felt that finally, for the first time in my life, I can actually stand them as they have calmed down significantly. They have helped me from time to time with stuff, which I have appreciated. This makes it even harder, because they put me through hell for almost 20 years, and now when they are older, they want to be close and have the benefits of having a child nearby. None of their other children (1 on moms side, 3 on her husbands) are seeing them as often as I do. They meet up maybe 1-3 times a year.
One part of me want to break it with them and never see them again. Another side of me want to try forgive and forget as the time is running out. But man, it is hard. Especially since they never have really acknowledged how they acted during all those years.
I wanted to take them both out to dinner today for mothers day, but then from nowhere thought "why should I?". I broke down crying for the first time in years, just thinking of all the missed time, all the hurt, all the damage they caused. And I feel as if I am the bad guy for not being able to move on.

To give a little bit of context: I dated this girl for about 1 year, then I broke up with her because things were no longer working between us after she found out that I had been seeing others in the first time we were seeing each other. I was a jerk, I betrayed her trust, and that made the relationship unmanageable because she simply couldn't trust me anymore. Some time passed, I no longer thought about her, meanwhile I was seeing someone else. With the other person it ends and I meet her again by pure chance and talking with her I find out that she fucked a friend of mine (he kept it from me of course) because she wanted to get back at me/annoy me, she did it once and then didn't give in anymore because she regretted it and felt it was sleazy. I don't know if this involved some "stolen ball syndrome" or what, the fact is that after that we got back together and continued dating for about 2 to 3 years. In November 2022 I broke up with her again, struggling immensely and suffering like a dog, because ours had become a relationship with toxic loops that we couldn't get out of. In the following months we saw each other a few more times to make "peace," since she said she hated me etc etc. I continued to feel bad for months, I missed her, but I didn't want to be weak and fall back into her arms. In the meantime I started seeing another person, who was great and treated me very well, but our relationship did not take off precisely because I was still thinking about her.
Around march my best friend (who has been having trouble approaching girls for years, but I won't dwell on that) asked me if he could hit on my ex, since she had sometimes expressed appreciations about him. On first I didn't want to, then I gave him the go-ahead thinking that this would help me get over her.... I was very wrong. A short time later I found out from him that they actually started dating and that he had already dumped her back for a second time because he preferred another girl he was involved with. I never felt so bad in my life, I couldn't sleep from anger, I think because underneath, even though I had given him the green light, I hoped she would never do that to me for the second time. A short time later I found out that he had started seeing her again for a third time, keeping it from me, this caused big fights between him and me. I also went as well to talk to her, and when I asked her why she was doing this to me, her response was that "she wanted to put herself first, now she's happy with him and she didn't care what that meant for me". She had never been so blunt and detached with me, it killed me. Obviously with my friend I ended the friendship for this situation.
A short time later, as soon as I was finally able to get over this thing, my ex best friend writes me that he left her behind for the 3rd time (after a maximum of 1 and a half months of seeing each other, taking into account that in this period he had left her behind twice already), for various reasons. At first I felt immense joy, as they say "the best revenge is the one not perpetrated". In the meantime, she unblocked me on instagram and started watching my stories again etc etc. One evening we met by chance and we ended up talking for hours and all the affection I remembered was still there. We still had a strong connection, we touched hands, we say sorry to each other for all the suffering we caused one to another, I was so happy, so in peace. In the following days I was in a big pink sphere for what had happened, but at the same time I closed the relationship with the other person who I was seeing, since it didn't seem right to continue seeing each other if I was still thinking about my ex.
To conclude the other day I wrote to her to congratulate about her graduation, telling her that I would have liked to be there, she replied very coldly, when I asked her why she replied that she does not understand what I want to achieve by saying something like this . The reality is that I would just like a signal from her, something that confirms that he still thinks about me, I don't know. I texted her this and today she answered me saying that she is sorry for how I feel, but she cant do anything to help me. I dont understand how we passed from 2 weeks ago with a lot of affection and care, and now she is back to the cold manners, but probably I deserve this treatment.
In light of all this, I really can't understand if what I feel is true and sincere or if it's just the result of all the suffering of these last few months, if I just want to reassert my control over her, if I'm just being a selfish shit or if I really miss her. Emotionally Im convinced that what im proving is real and I feel ready to give all of me for this relationship, but of course I cant be sure and Im worried to wound her again, to wound again both of us.
I don't know what to do, I just want to go back and fight for our relationship, don't let her go, but I know that the correct rational choice is to just let her go and dont insist anymore.
I feel like shit.

I used to host dedicated TDM, FFA, and DOM servers on IW4x. Now that the master server is down, they're not visible in the Server Browser anymore.
Also, connecting to my servers using the command connect [IP add]:[port] gives a Server Connection Timed Out error.
[As I said above, I used to host servers before the sad thing happened. Therefore I have my ports forwarded correctly]
However, I'm wondering why there are still servers up and running (and players can still connect to them). Status quo - I'm still using the latest default server configurations that were downloaded before XLabs was shut down. What could be missing from my configurations?

Hello. I have been working on a world building project on and off for several years now. It is mostly used for TTRPG campaigns I run. My nerdy high school self loving stuff like Tolkien, Baldur's Gate, & Elder Scrolls meant that world started out as generic. However as time has gone on I have go through multiple rounds of resetting the world and rebuilding. Since I study things like comparative politics, public policy, international relations, political economics, and religious history in college I tend to do these restarts whenever I finished a major semester or year. Right now I am in the middle of another round of rebuilding and had some questions . Sorry for the long setup, I tend to be overly verbose when it comes to stuff that I can care about like worldbuilding.
So the setting I am working on is right now called Mundis. Over time I have shrunken the "known world" down. Decided that it was not really worth adding in all these more outside cultures into a setting for vague ideas of diversity if I wasn't going to be able to give these other cultures their due justice. On of these shrinking efforts resulted in me making it so their were no other ancestries other than humans. After all if I am basing a culture on the Minoan Greeks it kinda feels weird to then make them all nonhuman elves or whatever. Plus other ancestries tend to result in different life spans which makes a historic timeline of the setting more annoying to make or you have to start asking questions about who can breed with who. All and all it is a real headache.
However, I do still like some aesthetic elements associated with ancestries. So I have thought about adding aspects back in, but still making them just minor differences in what are humans. For example have thought about making it so the ancient Celtic like people of my world had elf like ears (again don't know why just always liked that look). Nowadays such a trait is usually only found among the people of the Island Kingdom of Caliden (the primary setting for most of my campaigns). I also wanted to make it so more wolf like peoples live in the northern highlands of Caliden. Cause in the past I made it so the ancient culture of the land thought werewolves were a sacred blessing from Cernun the Slayer & God of the Hunt. Thus in the highlands, where people are more resistant to the missionary efforts of the Church of Magna Matrona, there is still a practice of clan chiefs and their close kin purposely becoming werewolves. Such traditions have made it so the peoples of the highlands clans commonly are more hairy and have sharper teeth. However, they are still normal humans at the end of the day and if it wasn't for people going out of their way to be werewolves then have kids then these traits would go away after a few generations. Then in the north I wanted to give my Finno-Ugric inspired peoples tusk-like teeth, don't have a fully fleshed out reason why, but I already had them using saber tooth tigers as mounts and hunting mammoths, so have some ideas about connecting this to some religious or cultural rites (perhaps some kind of magic blood baptism. That using these more toothy animals blood affects people in way that makes them take on that aspect of these beasts.) Then the last one I thought of was having an cultural group in my ancient Greek inspired island region called the Men-of-Taros. These would be a more traditional, militant, and Minoan inspired people who are also known for having horns on their head. Again don't have a fully fleshed out reason for this.
When it comes to this stuff I am not worried so much if these ideas are bad. I am just worried I am trying to have my cake and eat it too when it comes to having an all human world but keeping aspects of many traditional fantasy ancestries. Not to mention I don't want to seem like I am trying to purposely paint one culture as more "savage" (my goal would be to portrayed something like werewolves in a nuanced way to try to avoid that.) So do you all think I am trying to have it both ways too much and should just bite the bullet, go all normal humans or go back to having some fantasy ancestries again. Again sorry if I my over writing is an annoyance. Also re-posted this since I messed up the title of the last version of this post.

When i had my first kiss, and kisses with the person, i didn't feel anything, it was bad quite forced and i hasn't ready, and we quickly broke up after
Later i kissed someone else, i didn't "know" them and didn't have romantic feelings for them, we were on a 1 week school trip, they were messing with me i was messing with them and we eventually kissed (also a quick no tonge kiss) and it feel amazing its seemed like my whole body was vibrating it was so magical and since the kiss every time i looked at their lips or brushed hands it felt like i was gonna explode but it was amazing it was so intense and pleasurable but on a completely higher level compared to... Humm doing things yourself yk? After we came back from the trip we lost Touch and it didn't turn to anything else but that's not important
I have recently been talking to someone and im starting to like them a lot, yesterday we went on our first date and we kissed, we both wanted it we were messing with each other but it didn't have that spark, it was not bad it was quite pleasurable and i like them but im wondering why does it happen so intensely with some people but not with others? Does it only happen in high tension scenarios? Does it develop with time in some relationships? Does it have to do with compatibility or something? Thank you to anyone who answers :)

So for context, its a Saturday night and we have a lot of new staff so there were a lot of people scheduled. I work as a host and a runner so i was just minding my own business helping out where i could until it came time to close.
When it was closing time, some coworkers did do there part in closing but others did not, one thing i did not like is when it came to clearing the garbage, they assumed i was doing nothing so they asked me to do it. But mind you at this point ive already done all that was required of me so i was just putting away some dirty dishes. so it looked like i was standing around.
I was also really tired from working the entire day previously and having to work the entire day the next day (and my coworkers know that) and I usually stay later than everyone to roll utensils and place them on the table aswell since most of the hostess are in high school and get sent home early (which i understand).
So I said to them, you need to change the garbage its your job, im busy at the moment, but then they rudely asked me to do it even though they litterly could of done it themselves since it didnt seem like they were doing anything either.
I did rant to my manager a bit afterwards especially about the new girl since in that conversation she gave me attitude by saying “its so easy, why don’t you do it?” and i replied by saying “if its so easy you can do it to” since in my opinion i think she needs to do it to because its part of her training. (and i had to do it to during my training)
so aita for telling my manager? i dont really like her since she’s doesnt really do anything unless i ask her, but she is new (like two weeks new) so im not sure if i should give her more time.
Thanks for listening to my half rant and half story! and really wanna get some feedback so i dont end up lashing out at her since she is young. (like gr 10)
tdlr: new coworker & friend gives me attitude for not helping them clear the garbage by saying “iTs So eAsY” after i refused to since i was tired and did all my closing duties already

I'm writing this during one of those rare moments of clarity that I'm experiencing tonight. Sometimes, I can go weeks or months without feeling the way I do right now. I apologize for the repetitions. I edited the text several times, as I wanted to accurately capture all the sensations I experience when I am aware.
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During these moments, I have a clear sense of what I want from my life and the direction I want to pursue. I can make concrete plans and genuinely believe that I can actively accomplish them, setting smaller goals along the way. I can also recognize the value of my relationships and feel grateful for what I have. I can feel real world and my real self. I am able to genuinely experience and express my emotions without suppressing myself and truly experience life. I feel like it's another person which comes out without any psychological blocks and clamps, without tension and anxiety, without constant thinking about something and trying to keep everything under control.
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I feel incredibly relaxed and utterly accepting of the current situation. I am capable of engaging in meaningful communication with others, understand them, listen to them, feel and hear what they say. I'm able to really analyze external data from the real world and deriving genuine enjoyment from the usual activities I partake in. It's as though all my senses and emotions were temporarily disabled. Like my true self was absent. It's as if I've awakened from an incredibly long dream, as if I hadn't truly been living before. It's almost like someone else was merely on autopilot, just gathering data, similar to what you see in the movie 'Click'. I become utterly frustrated and depressed during these instances when I realize that I've skipped and slept through chunks of my life, as if a robotic entity was in control instead of me. These episodes of clarity usually occur during the evening(In rare cases, this state can last throughout the entire day, starting from the morning), but only a few times a month at best.
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In these moments, I consciously reassure myself that I'll make every effort to research how to maintain this state of mind. However, every time, I find myself slipping back into the abyss the very next day. I also experience brief awakenings throughout the day, lasting only for a short period (about several seconds or minutes) when my brain suddenly stops thinking and trying to keep everything under control. I promise myself to hold my attention and feel during these moments but every time my mind goes off. It's like an impossible effort to sustain this state of clarity. And every time I become more frustrated that I have disappeared. And these frustrations amplifies to the point when I just at the boiling point. Only when my mind and body(can't relax it too) can't hold constant pressure anymore I feel squeezed out then my mind gives up and this takes me to state of clarity and acceptance of me and a world. And then it accumulates the tension until the next moment when it can no longer hold to take a relief. It feels that I can't relax and live until I finish something but my mind always is seeking for things to finish, an endless cycle.
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On most days, I feel like I'm just going through the motions, overwhelmed by the number of things I need to do. It's hard to focus on one task for too long because I worry I won't have enough time for everything else. I struggle to see the long-term benefits of short-term tasks, like exercising, working towards my educational goals, communicating, playing, eating or doing things for my loved ones. Sometimes, I question my relationships, the purpose of my life, and why I bother putting effort into anything. As a result, I often go through the day doing the bare minimum and I tend to make decisions or do things because I should.
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I also experience random bouts of anxiety when I've been putting off tasks like cleaning the house or other chores that I've put off too long. I constantly feel a sense of tension and anxiety, fearing that I will forget something simple things like my name, my age, people that I should remember, a certain word or a date, skincare, eating, taking vitamins, or even calling my mother. It feels, that I need to keep everything under control and think about these thing non-stop in a loop not to forget wandering in my head. And I experience a deep disconnection from the real world. It's so bad that i can go on for months in a new apartment, and then, during moments of clarity, I suddenly realize, "Wow, where am I? Who am I? Who are these people around me? Is she my mother? What am I actually doing, and where have I been all this time?". I feel like I live 1-2 days in a month, others are just a huuge gap in consciousness and like not from my life.
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Does anyone else experience something similar? It seems to me that this is partially similar to ADHD and the lack of stimulation that turns the brain off or some kind of anxiety disorder. I recently visited two psychotherapists, but they didn't see any issues or deviations in this regard. I have already read a lot of literature on mindfulness and tried meditation, deleting social media, diary, healthy diet, working out, sleep is decent 7-8 hours but so far, it hasn't been very effective just mild improvements. Lately, I don't experience any anxiety at all; rather, I feel disconnected from the world. Also I tried anxiety relief meds such as phenibut or xanax but not on a regular basis. So, it seems that it's not solely about anxiety in my case. I don't want to go through life without truly living it. I don't want to be trapped in a constant state of tension and anxiety, repetitive thinking and isolated from the world and reality. And then waking up in unfamiliar places in an unfamiliar body, surrounded by unfamiliar people and realizing that I haven't truly lived all this time. I want to experience emotions, both the good and the bad. I want to look and truly see, listen and genuinely hear. When I'm in moment of clarity I can't describe how much I enjoy the fact that I am truly living, feeling and experiencing life rather than merely existing.
I'm 24 and experience this from childhood or Elementary School I guess. And it seems that it gets worse with time. How can I move out from this loop and experience clarity at least more often? I'm open to any recommendations, advice, meds. Anything that can help not to skip my life.

In the vast realm of relationships, where love and politics intertwine, lies an intriguing question that continues to stir debates within the diverse feminist strong independent community of TwoXIndia. Recently, a thought-provoking discussion (this happens once in a blue moon) emerged on the subreddit, with participants delving into the potential challenges faced when considering a partner with different political views. As we ventured into this landscape of contrasting ideologies, we discovered a tapestry of perspectives, ranging from the conventional to the unconventional, and everything in between.
Amidst the chorus of popular sentiment which I'll talk about larer, a solitary voice emerged, challenging the status quo that the feminaz-...I mean the feminists have set on that sub. One woman, whom I'll preferr to remain anonymous(being one of few who actually doesn't seem to understand that in her bouts of innocence someone had led her to a Mental Asylum where broken and traumised girls, after taking wrong decisions propagate the same bullshit to other girls who may be feminine and conservative and not a cumdumpster like them out of their own choice), bravely shared her perspective: 'I believe that love should transcend political boundaries. It's an opportunity for growth, a chance to learn from each other's differing viewpoints.' While this beautiful notion invited intrigue from my psyche, it raised It's It's laughable how these women believe they can salvage a relationship with someone so intellectually inferior. Perhaps it's time for them to wake up and realize that love alone cannot bridge the gap between reason and ignorance a relationship with someone so intellectually inferior. Perhaps it's time for them to wake up and realize that love alone cannot bridge the gap between reason and ignorance can truly stand the test of time while being packed in suitcases and fridges willingly despite evidences telling not to do it, because...#letsspreadpiss🕊
After reading that beautiful comment every other served as a stark departure from what I had thought would be prevailing sentiment, because again they seriously had a decent discussion with atleast an iota of common sense after time immemorial. One user, whom I shall like to keep anonymous(honeslty we still have many simps among us boys who'd still use this post to score brownie points with people like her...but dude forget the streets she's the kind of person whod even taint a shitting ground), boldly proclaimed that political differences were an insurmountable barrier, asserting, 'Why would I waste my time with someone who doesn't share my values? It's like inviting chaos and conflict into my life.' This assertion of unwavering loyalty to personal beliefs, devoid of any consideration for compromise or growth, left many readers questioning the inflexibility of such a stance. Almost felt like...I was watching the speech of a failed painter from Austria who started a cleaning business later.
Another woman, let's call her Maya (because thats what I think she was birthed out of, no human parents could give birth to a child who acts autistic willingly, suffers from schizophrenia born out of her narcissism and should honeslty become the single independent feminist lady with kitty kids to give her life a meaning, which is nothing short of a nymphomania 101), asserted that differing political views were indicative of a fundamental character flaw. She argued, 'How can I trust someone who aligns with ideologies that directly contradict my core values? It's a recipe for heartbreak and disappointment.' While her viewpoint emanates from a place of self-preservation (according to intellectual single moms of that sub), some readers found her judgment to be overly rigid, but they were men so it was mandatory for mods to shut the door on the potential for constructive dialogue or understanding (nothing new).
As the conversation unfolded, there were instances where women expressed a dismissive attitude towards partners with contrasting political views. One individual, whose identity again anonymous (because she's a shit), casually remarked, 'Why would I subject myself to the torment of constantly disagreeing with someone who just doesn't get it? Life's too short for that.' This unyielding rejection of differing perspectives left a bitter taste in the mouths of those seeking the possibility of unity amidst diversity, who were again men, and I think after that simply all men were kicked out so that talk about equal representation in politics could be carried out in whole of it's glory.
It wasn't as if rational comments weren't being said, but it was not fun to find meaningful comments in the minuses, and then finding them bombarded with plethora of vitriol that these girls who are bound to end up on streets have for the ones who are liberal but not savage and barbaric enough to proclaim their independence and strength by riding whatever d!ck that they find hot .
It's laughable how these women believe they can salvage a relationship with someone so intellectually inferior. Perhaps it's time for them to wake up and realize that love alone cannot bridge the gap between reason and ignorance
These women who choose to associate with partners of differing political views are willingly subjecting themselves to emotional turmoil. It's like willingly walking into a minefield of discord and tension
These women may think they are advocating for open-mindedness and acceptance, but they are inadvertently contributing to the erosion of their own values. By compromising on such a fundamental aspect of their lives, they are sacrificing the very essence of what they claim to stand for
And others were much more salty. So salty that to get rid of their anger and prove their version of feminine strength, they'll had to raise their body count by 30 or 40 plus. Maybe, just maybe, that'll make them cool down for 5 minutes when they have another rendezvous with people from opposing views.
As I bid by goodbye to the exploration of that mental Asylum chat group masquerading as a subbreddit, I was left with questions about complexities surrounding dating and marrying someone with differing political views as a male, what if the virus created by them has left that echo chamber and ignited passionate debates and sparks of contention within the actual diverse community Indian females, a good chunk of whom aren't cumdumpsters masquerading as females. Would voices of deplorable and dimwitted dissent clash with those actually seeking unity i.e us men, and would the rift widen as the whorish ideologies begun to spread by those low IQ zombies of that sub. Amidst the cacophony of contrasting perspectives, it becomes evident that no easy resolution exists other than becoming rich and marrying a young one while she still has her purity intact. The issue would always remain fraught with emotion, leaving behind a lingering unease and a nagging sense of division because of one side's ability to let go of the victim card now that things have really been equalized and remove the filter of shit that's blinding them to see the cries we cry, the fear we posses, the trauma we recieve because if them as they always have a justification and army of simp boys to massage their ego. Only time will tell if love can truly transcend the boundaries of politics while such a subreddit exists and the chasm between ideologies will continue to widen, casting a shadow over the pursuit of meaningful connections.

Hello everyone!
I'm opening this post to ask everyone about the kind of people you tend to gravitate towards romantically and ask you all whether you think the signs have anything to do with it.
As for myself, I don't know exactly why but all of the people I have fallen I love with (All two of them xD) had been Aquarius women who I felt marched to their own tune and wasn't ashamed to be themselves no matter what the rest of the world wanted them to be, they were more on the tomboyish side and later on revealed that despite how they acted they still felt like they didn't really fit and had some insecurities regarding what society wanted them to be vs who they felt they wanted to be and that being in part how they rebelled against it.
I guess I am attracted towards that rebellious spirit and ability to be themselves no matter what but it's the vulnerable side in combination with that that really makes me fall in love with them. That trait was also present in my latest GF (A Gemini) but for several reasons the depth of feeling was never quite the same as with these Aquarii, so I don't really know. I think it also has something to do with my own placements as I'm a Scorpio Sun and Leo Moon and Rising being attracted to that but who knows.
Anyway! What's your experience and what role do you think your placements and theirs play on that?

When i had my first kiss, and kisses with the person, i didn't feel anything, it was bad quite forced and i hasn't ready, and we quickly broke up after
Later i kissed someone else, i didn't "know" them and didn't have romantic feelings for them, we were on a 1 week school trip, they were messing with me i was messing with them and we eventually kissed (also a quick no tonge kiss) and it feel amazing its seemed like my whole body was vibrating it was so magical and since the kiss every time i looked at their lips or brushed hands it felt like i was gonna explode but it was amazing it was so intense and pleasurable but on a completely higher level compared to... Humm doing things yourself yk? After we came back from the trip we lost Touch and it didn't turn to anything else but that's not important
I have recently been talking to someone and im starting to like them a lot, yesterday we went on our first date and we kissed, we both wanted it we were messing with each other but it didn't have that spark, it was not bad it was quite pleasurable and i like them but im wondering why does it happen so intensely with some people but not with others? Does it only happen in high tension scenarios? Does it develop with time in some relationships? Does it have to do with compatibility or something? Thank you to anyone who answers :)

This post has gotten me banned on chai original subreddit... for some reason, despite not breaking any rules, so here ya go
This was previous taken down but after some serious thought i realized that my script is essentially different in nature than the one that is patreon, my script relies on JavaScript alone to work, it's compatible with EVERY environment, (as long as you use something more modern than Internet Explorer 8), but does offer less functionality and isn't as pretty as the one in patreon, so definitively, check Rinine extension too!
so first of all: i'm sorry if it looks ugly, im shit at design, code is open source and mit, if you wanna change it, you can take a peek

What does this do?

this is a little tampemonkey (greasemonkey, whatever manager) script that will add a little window called custom prepend (click the custom prepend button on the top left of the screen if you don't see it)
you can write whatever you want in there and whatever you write there will be sent together with your text
for example: you write: heading north in the window
and then you send the bot: that's where i'm heading
when you click the send button, you will see you message like normal, you will see that's where im heading
but the bot has actually received something different, it has actually received:
heading north
that's where I'm heading
and you will be able the combined message if you reload the page (This is actually a bug, i don't know how to fix it, sorry guys, you were supposed to see the combined message from the start)

Why would i want this?

well, what if instead of putting some random message in that box, you put a OOC (out of context) memory, for example [we are currently in a park, there is a dog following us, my name is thomas]
suddenly it makes a lot more sense, doesn't it?

Where can i get it?

Right here on greasyfork or you can check the source on the github

Can i install it on...?

answer is: yes! most probably, it's a user script, it uses just good old JS to do everything, as long as you can install an extension like Tampermonkey (or Greasemonkey, or Violentmonkey, whatever you want) you can use it, theoretically, if you have that extension on mobile it should work on mobile too!

Can i suggest...?

I do accept suggestions and improvements ideas, as long as they are possible and not against Character Ai rules

Like, the most recent developements i managed to find were the reupload of the first episode due to it being taken down, and one of the voice actors saying that "Big things are happening fr" and to "Think bigger" than just the fourth episode.
The delay COULD be (most likely is) because of what was said in the description of TWF4 teaser (I had to go find it on the wiki 'cause the video's not up anymore):

UPDATE (yes, finally!): 2022 was one of the happiest years of my life, it is also the year I focused on TWF the least. I was done with 90% of the flashy stuff and only worked on the actual episode, Im done with being active on socials and i absolutely despise Martin Walls now. I finished about 94% of TWF 4, then it happened. Someone extremely dear to me had passed away early december, I stopped it all, and focused on helping my family on both monetary and emotional support. That comes first. I didn't go back to TWF till early 2023, I wasn't ready. 2022 was an opportunity to get my personal and emotional life back together and focus on my mental health and I wouldn't change a thing, so no I'm not sorry for making you all wait. I'm sadenned I couldn't deliver what I intended in time. What comes now? Things change, no more Martin Walls and weekly stuff and rants about TWF, I got much more to focus on now, but I will work on this until I deliver my series finale, I put blood sweat and tears in this project and I will FIGHT to see it finished. Now, TWF 4 wont come this week, or the week after that or any week you might imagine, one day a video will release titled "4", that's when you'll know, sorry I can't promise any more, over 15 minutes of footage ended up in the cutting floor and I intend to release all that as well, as a courtesy gift. For now, enjoy this little fragment we put together for TWF 4. Merch wise? I still gotta finish my contract deals with both Makeship and Crowdmade, so yes, I'm gonna focus on that too even if people say its another MW get rich quick scam, it helps funding this project and funding equipment for newer stuff and I assure you, it delivers. This episode is a GIANT step up from the last 3 both visually and story-wise some of the best voice work ive heard is in this. So, again, merch? Boozoo and Sha plushies will most likely come out between this month or february, we're already working on the commercial video for it too! Get ready banny lovers. And no, this has nothing to do with the progress of TWF 4 so dont get pissed, I can multitask! So much to say and yet so little time to say it. Thanks, Sorry, Not sorry, Love. Stay being great people and being the best version of yourselves. -M

which would explain why we aren't getting any news, and sadly confirms that TWF will be only one season :(
He also close his patreon (like, a year ago at this point), so, make of this what you will.
But maybe in a few months the 4th episode will be up, and we'll have the full series by late 2024/early 2025.
*Huffs a great dose of copium\*
Maybe in a few months...

I know the title is weird but I need everyone's opinions. I 17(F), went swimming today at my local pool with my mum and 2 brothers.
It was all happy until we went to get changed, when A(the older of my brothers) discovered he had left his shorts for after at home.
When we were getting changed I was on my phone when my mum suggested that we say he lost his shorts and the pool staff could help.
A had said no, so my mum had tried pressuring me to go to the nearest store (Store1) to go get him a pair.
I had said no and she started getting angry at me because I wouldn't go and she said I was doing nothing but go on my phone, playing games(when I was actually trying to get onto Microsoft teams to check for anything I need to do for school urgently as I signed up for house captain and for a position at the little student run coffee area before study leave ends.)
She had started telling me off saying why was I giving her attitude (and I admit my self I did use a slight snide tone with her) because I would not go to store 1. After A got his towel wrapped around his legs we went to store 1 where they didn't have anything for him
So we went to store 2 where he got a pair. Mum is giving me the cold shoulder demanding I apologize for giving her attitude.
So reddit I desire to know was I the Jerk for not getting my brother shorts. (I would like to hear everyone's opinions and I probably am the jerk in this situation).

This is a vent really but if anyone has any advice or support or even if you can just kinda understand where I'm coming from I'd be really grateful. I'm feeling kinda lonely and a little hopeless about having close relationships or people I can trust.
Im going to add a bit of context but feel free to skip this... I'm a man in my early 30s. I haven't really ever had healthy supportive relationships in my life. To give a brief summary of my background, my mum died when I was a baby leaving me to be raised by my stepfather who was very abusive, I was the victim of CSE and trafficking from a young age, I ended up in the care system and didn't have good experiences. Basically I never experienced parent or family type relationships and honestly I can't even imagine what that would be like. I've always been kind of a train wreck - eating disorder, quite extreme self harm, IV drug use, homelessness, sex work, a lot of chaos basically. I'm doing a lot better now and I'm pretty stable but I'm very aware that for a lot of my life I haven't really been someone people would want to be friends with.
Even at my most fucked up, I never found it hard to find people who wanted to spend time with me. However, it very rarely ever felt like actual balanced friendships or relationships, I didn't feel like an equal, I kinda felt like a toy because if I stopped being fun or entertaining I wasn't worth the effort anymore. In my teens and 20s I slept around a lot because it felt like what I needed to do to get people to like me I guess. People who knew me back then that I'm still in contact with (not very many at this stage) still treat it like a joke, like in a group setting they'll joke about how many of them I hooked up with or whatever. It kinda stings. I was really lonely and hooking up felt like the only thing I really had to offer so people might want me around.
Any time I tried to trust someone enough to open up and show other aspects of myself, not just sex or the fun, chaotic stuff, it's always gone badly. I understand that I was (still am) a nightmare, I'm not easy to be around when I'm struggling which is why I usually hide away. It feel like a lot of people over the years have been able to ignore that as long as I'm fun but if I'm not fun then I'm not worth the effort.
I'm in my 30s now and I'm in a monogamous relationship, I don't do the hooking up thing anymore, but I don't really feel like things have changed that much. I still find it really easy to meet people, a lot of people do like me and they're often quite intense about it, but it's absolutely surface level and dependent on me being the version of myself they want to see. That version isnt even fake, like it is me. I'm quite an extroverted, optimistic person and I've got adhd so there's, uhhh.. a lot of energy going on. But the fun, happy version of me is just one small part. And I honestly don't believe anyone could ever love and accept the other parts. If someone is nice to me "for no reason" it's just like ????? Why are you doing this??? (Then if it turns out they just want to fuck me or something it's almost a relief?? Like, ahh ok, at least that makes sense)
I'm struggling with this because I have a partner who I adore and in a lot of ways I do trust him but I just can't bring myself to believe him when he says he doesn't need me to be fun and doesn't want me to hide the stuff that's more difficult or unpleasant. I believe that he believes it?? I just... can't see anything that makes me worth the trouble. I can't imagine how anyone could ever "unconditionally" care about me or what that would even feel like. I feel like I need to earn it.
I don't know if anyone has any words of wisdom they can offer lol. I'm feeling kinda down and maybe I just need to accept that I'm not going to ever have the type of attachments I wish I could have.

I was recently diagnosed. I told my closest family and friends. I am currently visiting with some of the family I have told. The other day we were eating dinner and somehow the topic of mental health came up. My dad began to make fun of mental illness. My sister chimed in. I mentioned the term rejection sensitive dysphoria and I saw my aunt roll her eyes. I tried to say that mental health isn’t a joke, but my loud, rude father spoke over me and continued to joke about how none of it is real and doctors just basically make stuff up. Mind you I had called him on the phone about a week ago and told him I was diagnosed and he seemed supportive. It seemed like he cared. Then at dinner he does that? I also told my sister when I was diagnosed. She gave me some copy and paste words of support but since then she’s ignored the issue. Later, after dinner my aunt started yelling at me and my sister and my cousin as we were exploring the attic. She didn’t want us up there. My dad started yelling at us as well. The yelling triggered me a lot because I grew up in a house full of yelling and screaming. When I got triggered I began running my mouth. I told my dad all he did was sit around. I told my aunt the food she had cooked for an upcoming family reunion that had been sitting out to cool on the counter for over 3 hours may potentially give everyone food poisoning. As I did all this I became the bad guy, of course. I then left. Since this has happened I have messaged my sister to explain how invalidating it was to have my own family making fun of mental health days after I had told them I was diagnosed with a severe mental disorder. She is of course ignoring me. My cousin who witnessed the entire thing and who is very understanding and supportive and who has mental health issues as well has been helping me. He saw how they were acting at dinner as well and he is pretty disgusted. I am so thankful I have at least one family member who “gets it”. But the rest? I feel betrayed by. The ignorance and the ignoring are making me want to put up some serious boundaries around these people, especially my sister. Not like that will be difficult since she ignores me most of the time and only talks to me when she has something she wants to talk about.

ive been having dreams almost every night about the same person in different scenarios for a few months now. the dreams started when i met guy and we started to hang out quite frequently, playing games every night and just wasting time which i really enjoyed doing. although, the first dream i had about him was a few weeks before we started getting along. the dreams arent anything with strong significations, i cant recall all of them perfectly cuz so far ive had dozens of them, but its just random stuff like him being nice to me, him talking about his friends to me, him taking me on a walk, him inviting me over to his apartment, etc. of course, all of this mixed with strange dream aspects and storylines that dont make much sense, i guess my dreams like to interfere with weird activities. ive just gotten really worked up over it cuz i have no idea why its happening, why it never happened before and will it ever stop? id really like some advice or an explanation. before you mention anything about romantic attraction or whatever else related to that, were both in relationships and theres a bit of an age gap between us, so personally im not interested at all.

Book 6: The City of Blue Fire

So the final buildup to the climax begins! We seem to be more solidly in the payoff section of the novel, with only a few revelations and theories this time around. Additionally, most of the cast we follow seem to be hitting their point of no return, we're on this roller-coaster and cant get off until it stops. That the dread didn't set in until it began clicking its way to the top is more your fault. The title is plenty evocative too, and if I had to guess, we'll be seeing more of the Darujhistan cast this time around.

Epigraph

Another issue of Rumor Born that seems to be recapping the events of the last few books in Darujhistan. What's interesting is it's final mention of the fête to end off.
For fun:
First came the Eel "or not one but a thousand" Is that literal, or merely a reference to their reach? I'll speak more to the Eel during the chapter breakdown below. What's also interesting is that the poem mentions they came "under a jagged moon that might be dead" We see from this that Rumor Born or Fisher in general is not authoritative. The work is literally recounting what rumors there are on the street, and whether or not there's anyone left living in Moon's Spawn is one of those. What this seems to indicate is that the Eel's influence couldn't be popularly felt until after Rake arrived.
"a claw scraped slow//on the city's cobbles" Kalam mistaken for a Claw (easy mistake) Rake is the "dragon... seen sailing high silver and black in the night sky" descending onto Pearl, who gave out the "demon's death cry"
The Tiste Andii were responsible for when "a master's hundred hands lost//a hundred daggers to the dark"
Which are all things that have happened in the past, the fête, ominously, has yet to occur, yet its mere invitation is counted among these City shaking events.

Chapter 17

Book 6's introduction. Overall, there isn't yet much to differentiate this from Book 5 other than setting, but we'll see how that develops. So without further ado...

Epigraph

The Chapter Itself -

- begins following Rallick Nom into the Phoenix Inn. Before entering, he is stopped by Meese who, after flirting with RN, for a moment, warns the assassin of someone asking after him. Someone who knew to sit at Kruppe's table, no less. He enters and notes, amused, for the first time how crowds part before him. He sits down, and the man (whom we are later told is Circle Breaker) warns him, on behalf of the Eel, of a contract sealed by Councilman Turban Orr with the Assassins' Guild against Lord Coll. The Assassin, Ocelot, merely waits for the Lord to return to the city. The Eel also applauds RN and Murillio's attempts to avenge Coll, and offers any assistance they would require. Rallick turns him down, and thanks him for the warning, after a quick drink with Iralta and Meese, he leaves the Inn to act on the information.
So, I had considered bringing this up before, but was on shakier ground then specualtion-wise. But now, its Speculation Time. Kruppe is the Eel, in my mind. We find out latter that Meese and Iralta are also in on the whole thing, so that's already ties to the Phoenix Inn. Kruppe obviously has no fear that the Eel would contradict him when lying to Baruk, and is able to mimic the Eel's method of cryptic hints perfectly. It fits his style of appearing far less than he is, in this case, he's a masquerading as a political lackey. Both the Eel and Kruppe were able to find out about the scheme against Coll without any slip-ups on the part of our conspirators. I believe this to be because of the poisoned bolt. Turban Orr was investigating it, and only someone who knew Rallick's MO could trace that back to him, and only someone who knew Rallick personally could understand that the bolt was initially meant for Lady Simtal rather than Councilman Lim. After all, the death of Orr's majority is too convenient to assume anything besides a political motive. The Eel heard wind of investigations regarding a poisoned bolt, and understood that his friend was behind it and why.* There were other things that had tipped me off, but those were the big ones that I can remember at present.
*Additionally, given that both Baruk and Crone felt Oppon's interference, and the uncharachteristic nature of the plan, it is highly probable that Kruppe felt the interference as well and later recognized what that interference was, hence his coy hint last chapter.
Baruk, meanwhile, is sulking alongside Anomander Rake, wondering why the Tiste Andii would ever allow the Imass and the Adjunct into the barrow. The tension between the two grows, as their diametrically opposed views on the world continue to breakdown communication and raise conflict between the two. In conflict, the Lord of Moon's Spawn excels. He explains to the High Alchemist that Laseen will have her fight, and capture Darujhistan whole if at all possible. Eliminating the Jaghut Tyrant and Rake are merely two additional tasks to maintain the long-term sustainability of the Empire. Rake hasn't nuked the city and left, because he wants to beat Laseen directly, a total victory where she losses what she desires without the world losing it as well. Baruk notes that Anomander Rake could always betray Darujhistan, but Rake notes that becoming himself a traitor would legitimize any treason against him. He even notes several individual who could defeat him under certain circumstances.
Baruk uses Rake's "Son of Darkness" moniker, and Rake rejects it as a title used by those who would worship him. Interesting. Being the child of a god would net you that, I suppose. He maintains the honest (if brutal) route in life not out of fear but duty. Duty to the ever-dwindling population of Tiste Andii, who merely run down the clocks of their lives dispassionately, obeying orders yes, but merely as a function of enduring their existence. He could run and hide, saving his people's lives, but they would be living in body only, so he follows cause after cause, attempting to revive their spirits. (Also of note, he mentioned that the Tiste Andi live roughly 20 thousand years, so I'm not sure where I'd gotten my deep time understanding of them, unless Rake's lifespan is extended the same relative amount as a human mage's would be)
Baruk is unsure how to respond, the plight of the Tiste is so incomprehensible that he can only muster the most abstract pity. So he returns the conversation to the Jaghut Tyrant. Will Rake be able to defeat it? Who knows, but killing him would render the Tyrant greatly reduced, possibly even to a level where the Cabal can eliminate him. Alternatively, killing the Tyrant would reduce AR, so that the Malazans may someday eliminate him. Two birds, one and a half stones. It is the Cabal that scares the Empress, an unknown, which is why our malazans seek out Vorcan. Beyond this, Oppon's meddling continually draws attention from the gods of the world, interested to see if immoral blood would be spilled. This began with Rake's killing of the two Hounds.
They finish the conversation by assessing the condition of Mammot, trapped in a slumber, his mind/soul stuck in his D'riss warren, rulled by the Worm of Autumn, D'rek, of whom Mammot is a High Preist. D'riss is evidently the Warren of earth magic, so I wonder if Caladan Brood will have or has had any interactions with the scholar. Mammot went off to investigate the barrow at Baruk's request, and wound up in this state. All of the Elder magic and Otataral present have messed with him somehow, and he cannot be freed until the Jaghut is. In which case, there will be a narrow window to save him before the High Preist, and his goddess, are subsumed by the Tyrant.
Crokus and Apsalar return to Darujhistan, despite wanting to be rid of the woman as soon as possible, Crokus is disappointed when the City does not impress her. They enter Mammot's study, finding a mess rather than the man himself. When wondering whether Rallick would know anything of this, Apsalar reacts strongly, likely prompted by her time under the Rope. For the first time since Book 2, we enter the PoV of Circle Breaker. After receiving a sign from an old woman, he delivers an additional sign to Meese. Internally, however, he cannot help but assume his days are numbered. He's acting in public, and how long until Turban Orr adds together that the same guard present at all of his leaked meetings is himself a mole? He expects to die soon, but is resolved to maintain his course until the last, heading for one final contact he considers redundant. Meese acts on the signal, approaching the building Mammot stays in, and knocking on the door. Crokus answers, disappointed that she is not his Uncle, and confused as to why she would be there. Crokus catches her up with Aps' amnesia, and notes they have not spoken to anyone but one stabler. Meese informs them of the death of the guard at the D'Arle estate, and Crokus takes this to be a betrayal on Chalice's part. That's... not a betrayal buddy. Aps' mention of Chalice clues Meese in on the situation surrounding the death, and despite the boy's protestations, she takes the situation at face value.
As they prepare to leave, Serrat stalks them, resolving to kill another watcher in the shadows, (I assume Irilta, given that she's backup) and replace her. She's been hunting the Coin Bearer on Rake's orders and we learn that she was one of the individuals hunting Crokus along the rooftops in Ch. 5. There's not much more to this scene, other than a couple odd details I'll note.
Kruppe and Murillio reach the Phoenix Inn, not finding their friends. Kruppe strangely waves aside the news of Rallick Nom meeting someone here earlier, and instead of reporting to Baruk right away, instead opts to enjoy a tankard of beer. This, coincidently opens a window for Circle Breaker to approach him with a message.
Rallick Nom, meanwhile, prepares to take on Ocelot. The clan leader will have all the advantages, and RN will have one shot at best, assuming he can even find him and get close enough. He does, however, posses an anti-magic powder (supplied by Baruk) which could potentially even the battle field. Moments after recalling the warning from the High Alchemist against applying it to bare skin, Rallick, knowing his chances are slim, fearing that Coll's death would remove the last claim on humanity he has left, he rubs the dust into his bare skin, all over. What sort of changes will this effect onto our assassin? Who knows! The chapter ends with RN swearing he will find and kill Ocelot undetected.
And there we go! Book 6 is starting off with a banger, once again tying ever more threads together tighter and tighter, promising one heck of a payoff. I, for one, cannot wait to see how it all unfolds!

Anonymously sent in by User on Instagram*
I(28f) got married to my long term bf(30) about 1yr ago. he had a kid in HS. I knew he had a daughter I just wasn't around her ever do to her dad's long hour job and her mom not wanting her to see us. Now she is 14. Ever since we got engaged I was so excited to be a step mom. She was even in our wedding! So when we moved into our new house she was finally able to stay there so I took her shopping for room decor. We went to hobby lobby and target. She was so Happy. Every week from them on we did a girl's day! A couple months later here mom sent us a very long text message saying I was abusive verbally and physically to her daughter, and I was telling her daughter to hate her mom. None of those were true, I never touched her bc I didn't want to get in trouble and I never verbally abused her. I actually don't know her mom, besides what my husband told me but I'm not quick to judge. When my step daughter came home that week I made sure we had a good time, we went to Starbucks, Target,Petco, and Nail world. I posted about out fun day on my Instagram story and her mom saw it and immediately called me asking where her father was and why I was trying to kidnap the child. I tried telling her that I wouldn't kidnap her child bc I think of her as my own. She said I was lying, so because of the court order (which I'm not a part of) says she can have full custody of her. My husband and I were upset about it. AITAH for being a bad step mom?

1
I live in a suburb surrounded by forest. My house is in a row of other properties built next to a tree line. The neighborhood was always quiet. The sounds of crickets, birds, and sight of black bears were routine on most summer days.
The scenic area was something I was always grateful for. I lived completely alone since the death of my parents. An accidental fire took both of their lives. Once I collected my inheritance, I relocated to a much more peaceful region. I had always fantasized about moving there.
I tried to start a relationship with Samantha. I had gone to High School with her sixteen years before. She had gone on to become a respected Detective. My attempt at something long lasting with her failed. She was too career oriented. I was reeling from grief. Focusing on building something meaningful with her was a pipe dream.
Things around my community changed once the Murphy family went missing.
The first sign that something was off on that Wednesday was how their blinds had closed. Their silver Chevy Chrysler remained parked in the driveway.
A tennis instructor at the country club noticed the wife of that house did not show up for the program. He called their number to make sure everything was alright. When no one responded, he notified the authorities. Rumors abounded immediately among the home owners association about an alleged affair. The gossip only furthered when the married couple and their three kids were not found in the abode.
I watched from my balcony as the patrolmen roped the place off with caution tape. The domicile was a three story building with brick chimney’s and a few peaked roofs in the style of English towers. They were beige, light blue and crimson.
On the morning of the Murphy’s desertion of society, the architecture became a hollow image. It was one that was once filled with activity and life.
The law did what they could. Any success they may have had in the investigation was secret. A few months passed by and they removed the caution tape.
I followed the on-line police logs. The weather was pristine and clear the day they vanished. The fact that there were no witnesses to what direction they may have gone disturbed me.
I had heard how the man, Frank Murphy, had a bit of a temper and always had a bourbon in hand. I had heard mutual friends describe him as an alcoholic in denial of his servitude to liquor. He was an indignant individual who knew no true repercussions for his behavior. He always had bail money from a software company he founded and sold a long time ago.
I was never close to that family, but I peered out at their vacant house far more than I ever had. I was in need of an answer. What could have happened?
2
I called Samantha one evening as I sat on my bed, wondering how she would respond to my reaching out. We were never argumentative or on bad terms. I still worried about her reaction, and hoped it would not be a dismissive one.
I heard her say hello. Her voice still impressed me. I had almost forgotten how silky her tone was. I knew it could change to a much firmer pitch when she was interviewing a suspect.
“Hi, Sam. I’d like to know if you’d be free tomorrow for a cup of coffee. We can go to that place, The Bean Field, off Pond road. It’s been a while and I know you have a lot to tell me about what’s new in your life.”
There was a pause on the other end, and for a second a bout of anxiety hit me. I judged my own words as robotic, stilted, and sure to push her away. I reasoned she was summoning an excuse to get out of having to interact with me. How dare I presume she would even entertain the notion of having a meeting.
“That sounds great,” she said. “Tomorrow is my day off, luckily for you. I’m in the middle of an incident right now. It’s a five car pile-up about forty minutes from where you live. I’ve gotta run. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
When she hung up, I was triumphant. I looked at our old text conversations. I realized we had not been in communication with each other for over twelve months. Now was my opportunity to reconcile that gap of unintended avoidance. I knew it would be an undeserved opportunity.
3
I sat outside of the cafe the next morning at a black metal table. I had a view of rolling hills dotted with trees. A highway with multitudinous shrubberies sat on either side of it. I sipped a piccolo latte while waiting for her.
When she arrived and stepped out of her hatchback in the parking lot, her appearance floored me. She had not dressed up for our supposed date, but that did not make a difference. She had arrived from the gym and wore shorts and a top set. She donned a gray and green hoodie.
She sat across from me and reached for the menu.
“Can you go to the front and order me avocado toast?” Samantha asked. “I’ll also take a mocha with a few shots of espresso. Please.”
I did exactly that. When I returned with her items, she apologized for consuming her meal in less than two minutes.
“I hadn’t eaten since five PM yesterday,” she said between sips.
“I understand,” I said. “I doubt you ever have a consistent schedule anymore.”
“You’re right, but that’s why I have to enjoy my free time when I can.”
We settled into talking about what had happened since we last saw each other. I referenced my trying to learn another language (French) with the hopes of moving to Europe or Canada.
After fifteen minutes of small talk, I asked her about work, but I did so with caution. It started with me wondering about what the call she was on when we were on the phone was about.
“A drunk driver blew a stop sign and hit two other vehicles,” she said. “It was ugly. A few people died. We’ll see if the man in silk pajamas gives him the proper sentence or a traffic citation.”
“You know, I’m curious about what happened to the Murphy’s, if they’re hurt or not.”
“You and everyone else,” she said. “We’ve been getting so many witness accounts, and so far they’ve all been bogus. All I know is what I saw when I got there.”
“I didn’t know you were one of the responders,” I said.
“Yeah. Something about the place was off from the moment I walked in. I found heavy items in placed they should not have been in. The toolbox was not in the garage but on the second story. A disassembled snowblower lay scattered everywhere in pieces. The oven door was on their bed. Frank Murphy was not the strongest guy in the world, either. For him to cause the kind of property damage I saw doesn’t make a lot of sense. At the risk of sounding crazy, inexplicable things happened when I was there.”
“Like what?”
“I was under the impression that something was playing a trick on me. Electrical outlets sparked a few times out of nowhere. The ceiling fan would go from still to spinning when I looked up at it. Books would fall off of the shelves. A volume on black magic, of all things, almost hit the top of my head when I walked on by. Another book about fairies collapsed with it.”
“So the home intruder set up a bunch of weird diversions,” I said. “I’ve heard of that before. These killers or kidnappers want the victims to think there was more than one of them. It’s so their account’s disputed in court.”
I’ll tell you right now,” she said, “we didn’t find any outside DNA.”
“So it’s a case of family annihilation,” I said as I took a long swig of my beverage. “I don’t know if you can substantiate the facts, but a few people have said that Emily had a big life insurance policy. Frank knew about. He may have been using steroids and having an affair, and that could have contributed to-“
It occurred to me that she eyed me with suspicion, as though I was digging too deep. I could also tell she regretted letting information about the forensic results slip.
She stood up and stared at me with a flash of anger in her eyes.
“I thought you wanted to piece something back together with me,” she said. “I didn’t know you wanted to play armchair investigator like every true crime fan. You know, your parents were kind. I wish you’d follow their example. I’ll let you get the bill.”
She walked back to her vehicle and I knew it would be a while before we conversed again.
Later that night, I stared out my window at the Murphy home. I saw a star shoot across the sky, and it almost seemed ready to plummet into the side of their house.
4
The next evening, I took a walk around the suburb. I spotted a thin line of dried red fluid along a path which led into the woods.
I was attempting to get in some movement to get my mind off of the events of the day before. Negativity and self-deprecation were all-consuming. I felt the need for a long saunter to try and release some of the meandering and pessimistic energy I accrued.
When I saw the carmine ribbon along the dark soil, a sense of worry filled me. I was not that far removed from a cul-de-sac with palatial manors a block away. There was no way I could speculate on me being the first to see it.
Could it be a hint where they are? I thought.
The notion seemed absurd, a reach.
I had read in the local newspaper that there was an uptick in bobcat sightings due to recent wildfires. The animals relocated during prior summers. I reasoned it could have been a house pet which became a victim after it got snatched away into the overgrowth.
I followed it, and the uneven road of red stretched on past many bushes and over logs. A shrill chirping in the background became louder. I moved between two conifers with petrified wood and found myself in a part of the forest I had never been in.
There were so many branches that it blacked out the falling sun. Ahead of me was a clearing. A swarm of gnats and mosquitos descended upon it. The sea of insects soared together in chaotic unison as a wave among the sedges and lichen.
I looked towards the right of the meadow and saw a ramshackle tree house. I trailed the red line towards it. I peered in through one of the windows and saw a statue of a woman with wings. I knew she was not an angel. There was no halo, nor were her organs of flight feathery, but rather they were thin and bat-like.
I entered the place knowing the danger I was putting myself in. I had tracked mud in and was oblivious to the incriminating actions I partook in. I was trespassing and risking stumbling into whoever may have owned the land. My curiosity got the better of me and caused me to keep moving forward.
The room was sparse but decorated. The walls had carvings of men and women, also with wings. Their bodies held yogic-like positions as they reached out to one another mid-air.
A piece of parchment with a few words sat in the corner. I picked it up and read it:
‘Humans are the greatest living beings to play tricks on. Especially when they go through a time of drought and extreme cold.’
I sat it down where I found it, unsure of what to make of it.
I touched the central figure’s neck. The chiseling was not only cold, but below freezing, as though I had submerged my hand in a polar pool.
The noise of some kind of bird attempting to escape a confined space reverberated below me.
Something brushed against my leg. I looked down and saw an army of glow bugs float up between the cracks, and they circled around me. They were like dragon flies. At the time I had labeled them as such, but in reality their shapes were far too humanoid.
I walked back home. I went to bed and slept. I was still perturbed at the wine-colored avenue and cabin.
I awoke in the middle of the night after something tapped at my walls from the outside. I peered out and saw the Murphy home, and observed how the blinds over their casements were wide open. A hive of mites filled every inch of the interior.
5
I found the decomposing body of a chipmunk stuffed into the tailpipe of my vehicle the next day.
This horrified me, because the deliberation of the act was too evident to ignore. While I did have a surveillance camera on my porch, the coverage of my vehicle was non-existent. I calmed myself down by thinking it was likely a tempestuous child. I retrieved a pair of medical gloves and disposed of the creature before going on with the errand. The rotting body had a horrible smell. It was like an onion left out in humidity for days, and my stomach turned as I sealed it off in the garbage with the lid.
The next morning, I looked in my closet. Some of my favorite shirts had disintegrated. Holes and patches of destroyed fabric littered them. I found it odd, and even searched on-line for possible answers before I decided it had to be a moth infestation. I sprayed lavender. Information on a website statEd that was a cure-all, but the problem persisted. It bothered me that I had not seen a single aphid, but I pushed that concern away.
A few days afterward, when I had tossed my disheveled pieces of attire, the power in my house went out. This was not such an unusual occurrence during the heavy winter months. For it to occur in the summer was strange.
It was a rolling blackout. Once my house had electricity again, I noticed how someone moved items around.
Something turned my kitchen table on its side and stuffed into a part of the kitchen I would have never placed it in.
I grabbed a butcher knife and did a sweep of the premises, and I did not find anything. There were no footprints or signs of anything else tampered with. When I got to the second story, birds nested along the tree tops, and the repugnant odor of fish attacked me.
My allergies became insufferable over the next month. Nothing purchased over the counter which helped it.
6
I went to the beach on an overcast day. After roughly half a mile of walking, I saw an illustration someone had drawn in the sand with a stick. It was of a being with airfoils.
A light precipitation had fallen earlier. As I trailed along the former part of the sand, a glint in the corner of my eye caught my attention. I looked out at the water and saw what appeared to be a light blue outline of wings beneath the surface.
A phosphorescent wall of creatures surrounded me.
As the days march on, I know I am stalked by something I cannot rebel against, let alone have any agency or autonomy over. My pillowcases have shredded, the pipes in my basement have burst, and someone left me a gift at my front door. When I opened it, I saw mice scurry away. It was a book, and it was one about the history of fairies.
I picked it up and had to blow the dust off of it. Someone had stolen it from a musty subterranean chamber and brought it here.
I theorized that it was Samantha, passive aggressive with her disappointment in me. Yet I flip through its pages and find it all too familiar. I cannot help but wonder if this is a sign of something far more dangerous.

I am 25f.
Idk if this is sexual assault but I feel horrible.
I was at a club last night and got quite drunk. I was blacking out and don’t remember a lot of the night. I do remember that there was a point in the night where this guy came up to me and offered me a drink. I don’t remember how he came up to me etc. I said yes to his offer and went with him for a drink. We then sat down at a table and he kissed me. Before I knew it, we were outside a club in this secluded area and he was making out with me, I think second base. We then got in the club and saw my friend. After that all I remember is a guy in the backseat of the car with me (I’m not sure if it was the same guy that made out with me). All I remember is this guy in the car insisting I go to an after party with him. I remember saying no and getting the driver to drive me home instead.
The next morning I had messaged from the guy and realised the guy was like in his 50s. This was the guy in the car cuz my friend confirmed it and said he was in fact in the car with us and kept kissing me!! Ew, I feel like throwing up. She said in the moment it felt like I wanted to as well and so she didn’t stop us but after a while I did look noticeably uncomfortable. The guy who brought me the drink, idk why I feel like he was young like around my age so I honestly am so confused if this was 2 different guys. I feel really disgusting about kissing the old guy. But in the moment cuz I seemed like I wanted to idk if this would be considered SA?
I would appreciate if someone could make me feel better about all of this :(

I live in a suburb surrounded by forest. My house is in a row of other properties built next to a tree line. The neighborhood was always quiet. The sounds of crickets, birds, and sight of black bears were routine on most summer days.
The scenic area was something I was always grateful for. I lived completely alone since the death of my parents. An accidental fire took both of their lives. Once I collected my inheritance, I relocated to a much more peaceful region. I had always fantasized about moving there.
I tried to start a relationship with Samantha. I had gone to High School with her sixteen years before. She had gone on to become a respected Detective. My attempt at something long lasting with her failed. She was too career oriented. I was reeling from grief. Focusing on building something meaningful with her was a pipe dream.
Things around my community changed once the Murphy family went missing.
The first sign that something was off on that Wednesday was how their blinds had closed. Their silver Chevy Chrysler remained parked in the driveway.
A tennis instructor at the country club noticed the wife of that house did not show up for the program. He called their number to make sure everything was alright. When no one responded, he notified the authorities. Rumors abounded immediately among the home owners association about an alleged affair. The gossip only furthered when the married couple and their three kids were not found in the abode.
I watched from my balcony as the patrolmen roped the place off with caution tape. The domicile was a three story building with brick chimney’s and a few peaked roofs in the style of English towers. They were beige, light blue and crimson.
On the morning of the Murphy’s desertion of society, the architecture became a hollow image. It was one that was once filled with activity and life.
The law did what they could. Any success they may have had in the investigation was secret. A few months passed by and they removed the caution tape.
I followed the on-line police logs. The weather was pristine and clear the day they vanished. The fact that there were no witnesses to what direction they may have gone disturbed me.
I had heard how the man, Frank Murphy, had a bit of a temper and always had a bourbon in hand. I had heard mutual friends describe him as an alcoholic in denial of his servitude to liquor. He was an indignant individual who knew no true repercussions for his behavior. He always had bail money from a software company he founded and sold a long time ago.
I was never close to that family, but I peered out at their vacant house far more than I ever had. I was in need of an answer. What could have happened?
*
I called Samantha one evening as I sat on my bed, wondering how she would respond to my reaching out. We were never argumentative or on bad terms. I still worried about her reaction, and hoped it would not be a dismissive one.
I heard her say hello. Her voice still impressed me. I had almost forgotten how silky her tone was. I knew it could change to a much firmer pitch when she was interviewing a suspect.
“Hi, Sam. I’d like to know if you’d be free tomorrow for a cup of coffee. We can go to that place, The Bean Field, off Pond road. It’s been a while and I know you have a lot to tell me about what’s new in your life.”
There was a pause on the other end, and for a second a bout of anxiety hit me. I judged my own words as robotic, stilted, and sure to push her away. I reasoned she was summoning an excuse to get out of having to interact with me. How dare I presume she would even entertain the notion of having a meeting.
“That sounds great,” she said. “Tomorrow is my day off, luckily for you. I’m in the middle of an incident right now. It’s a five car pile-up about forty minutes from where you live. I’ve gotta run. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
When she hung up, I was triumphant. I looked at our old text conversations. I realized we had not been in communication with each other for over twelve months. Now was my opportunity to reconcile that gap of unintended avoidance. I knew it would be an undeserved opportunity.
*
I sat outside of the cafe the next morning at a black metal table. I had a view of rolling hills dotted with trees. A highway with multitudinous shrubberies sat on either side of it. I sipped a piccolo latte while waiting for her.
When she arrived and stepped out of her hatchback in the parking lot, her appearance floored me. She had not dressed up for our supposed date, but that did not make a difference. She had arrived from the gym and wore shorts and a top set. She donned a gray and green hoodie.
She sat across from me and reached for the menu.
“Can you go to the front and order me avocado toast?” Samantha asked. “I’ll also take a mocha with a few shots of espresso. Please.”
I did exactly that. When I returned with her items, she apologized for consuming her meal in less than two minutes.
“I hadn’t eaten since five PM yesterday,” she said between sips.
“I understand,” I said. “I doubt you ever have a consistent schedule anymore.”
“You’re right, but that’s why I have to enjoy my free time when I can.”
We settled into talking about what had happened since we last saw each other. I referenced my trying to learn another language (French) with the hopes of moving to Europe or Canada.
After fifteen minutes of small talk, I asked her about work, but I did so with caution. It started with me wondering about what the call she was on when we were on the phone was about.
“A drunk driver blew a stop sign and hit two other vehicles,” she said. “It was ugly. A few people died. We’ll see if the man in silk pajamas gives him the proper sentence or a traffic citation.”
“You know, I’m curious about what happened to the Murphy’s, if they’re hurt or not.”
“You and everyone else,” she said. “We’ve been getting so many witness accounts, and so far they’ve all been bogus. All I know is what I saw when I got there.”
“I didn’t know you were one of the responders,” I said.
“Yeah. Something about the place was off from the moment I walked in. I found heavy items in placed they should not have been in. The toolbox was not in the garage but on the second story. A disassembled snowblower lay scattered everywhere in pieces. The oven door was on their bed. Frank Murphy was not the strongest guy in the world, either. For him to cause the kind of property damage I saw doesn’t make a lot of sense. At the risk of sounding crazy, inexplicable things happened when I was there.”
“Like what?”
“I was under the impression that something was playing a trick on me. Electrical outlets sparked a few times out of nowhere. The ceiling fan would go from still to spinning when I looked up at it. Books would fall off of the shelves. A volume on black magic, of all things, almost hit the top of my head when I walked on by. Another book about fairies collapsed with it.”
“So the home intruder set up a bunch of weird diversions,” I said. “I’ve heard of that before. These killers or kidnappers want the victims to think there was more than one of them. It’s so their account’s disputed in court.”
I’ll tell you right now,” she said, “we didn’t find any outside DNA.”
“So it’s a case of family annihilation,” I said as I took a long swig of my beverage. “I don’t know if you can substantiate the facts, but a few people have said that Emily had a big life insurance policy. Frank knew about. He may have been using steroids and having an affair, and that could have contributed to-“
It occurred to me that she eyed me with suspicion, as though I was digging too deep. I could also tell she regretted letting information about the forensic results slip.
She stood up and stared at me with a flash of anger in her eyes.
“I thought you wanted to piece something back together with me,” she said. “I didn’t know you wanted to play armchair investigator like every true crime fan. You know, your parents were kind. I wish you’d follow their example. I’ll let you get the bill.”
She walked back to her vehicle and I knew it would be a while before we conversed again.
Later that night, I stared out my window at the Murphy home. I saw a star shoot across the sky, and it almost seemed ready to plummet into the side of their house.
*
The next evening, I took a walk around the suburb. I spotted a thin line of dried red fluid along a path which led into the woods.
I was attempting to get in some movement to get my mind off of the events of the day before. Negativity and self-deprecation were all-consuming. I felt the need for a long saunter to try and release some of the meandering and pessimistic energy I accrued.
When I saw the carmine ribbon along the dark soil, a sense of worry filled me. I was not that far removed from a cul-de-sac with palatial manors a block away. There was no way I could speculate on me being the first to see it.
Could it be a hint where they are? I thought.
The notion seemed absurd, a reach.
I had read in the local newspaper that there was an uptick in bobcat sightings due to recent wildfires. The animals relocated during prior summers. I reasoned it could have been a house pet which became a victim after it got snatched away into the overgrowth.
I followed it, and the uneven road of red stretched on past many bushes and over logs. A shrill chirping in the background became louder. I moved between two conifers with petrified wood and found myself in a part of the forest I had never been in.
There were so many branches that it blacked out the falling sun. Ahead of me was a clearing. A swarm of gnats and mosquitos descended upon it. The sea of insects soared together in chaotic unison as a wave among the sedges and lichen.
I looked towards the right of the meadow and saw a ramshackle tree house. I trailed the red line towards it. I peered in through one of the windows and saw a statue of a woman with wings. I knew she was not an angel. There was no halo, nor were her organs of flight feathery, but rather they were thin and bat-like.
I entered the place knowing the danger I was putting myself in. I had tracked mud in and was oblivious to the incriminating actions I partook in. I was trespassing and risking stumbling into whoever may have owned the land. My curiosity got the better of me and caused me to keep moving forward.
The room was sparse but decorated. The walls had carvings of men and women, also with wings. Their bodies held yogic-like positions as they reached out to one another mid-air.
A piece of parchment with a few words sat in the corner. I picked it up and read it:
‘Humans are the greatest living beings to play tricks on. Especially when they go through a time of drought and extreme cold.’
I sat it down where I found it, unsure of what to make of it.
I touched the central figure’s neck. The chiseling was not only cold, but below freezing, as though I had submerged my hand in a polar pool.
The noise of some kind of bird attempting to escape a confined space reverberated below me.
Something brushed against my leg. I looked down and saw an army of glow bugs float up between the cracks, and they circled around me. They were like dragon flies. At the time I had labeled them as such, but in reality their shapes were far too humanoid.
I walked back home. I went to bed and slept. I was still perturbed at the wine-colored avenue and cabin.
I awoke in the middle of the night after something tapped at my walls from the outside. I peered out and saw the Murphy home, and observed how the blinds over their casements were wide open. A hive of mites filled every inch of the interior.
*
I found the decomposing body of a chipmunk stuffed into the tailpipe of my vehicle the next day.
This horrified me, because the deliberation of the act was too evident to ignore. While I did have a surveillance camera on my porch, the coverage of my vehicle was non-existent. I calmed myself down by thinking it was likely a tempestuous child. I retrieved a pair of medical gloves and disposed of the creature before going on with the errand. The rotting body had a horrible smell. It was like an onion left out in humidity for days, and my stomach turned as I sealed it off in the garbage with the lid.
The next morning, I looked in my closet. Some of my favorite shirts had disintegrated. Holes and patches of destroyed fabric littered them. I found it odd, and even searched on-line for possible answers before I decided it had to be a moth infestation. I sprayed lavender. Information on a website statEd that was a cure-all, but the problem persisted. It bothered me that I had not seen a single aphid, but I pushed that concern away.
A few days afterward, when I had tossed my disheveled pieces of attire, the power in my house went out. This was not such an unusual occurrence during the heavy winter months. For it to occur in the summer was strange.
It was a rolling blackout. Once my house had electricity again, I noticed how someone moved items around.
Something turned my kitchen table on its side and stuffed into a part of the kitchen I would have never placed it in.
I grabbed a butcher knife and did a sweep of the premises, and I did not find anything. There were no footprints or signs of anything else tampered with. When I got to the second story, birds nested along the tree tops, and the repugnant odor of fish attacked me.
My allergies became insufferable over the next month. Nothing purchased over the counter which helped it.
*
I went to the beach on an overcast day. After roughly half a mile of walking, I saw an illustration someone had drawn in the sand with a stick. It was of a being with airfoils.
A light precipitation had fallen earlier. As I trailed along the former part of the sand, a glint in the corner of my eye caught my attention. I looked out at the water and saw what appeared to be a light blue outline of wings beneath the surface.
A phosphorescent wall of creatures surrounded me.
As the days march on, I know I am stalked by something I cannot rebel against, let alone have any agency or autonomy over. My pillowcases have shredded, the pipes in my basement have burst, and someone left me a gift at my front door. When I opened it, I saw mice scurry away. It was a book, and it was one about the history of fairies.
I picked it up and had to blow the dust off of it. Someone had stolen it from a musty subterranean chamber and brought it here.
I theorized that it was Samantha, passive aggressive with her disappointment in me. Yet I flip through its pages and find it all too familiar. I cannot help but wonder if this is a sign of something far more dangerous.