You don't know me... I don't know you, but I want to.
If you started singing Sam Hunt right now, just go ahead and send a chat request. 💗
About Me:

• 5'2, brunette, brown eyes, with a thick, curvy, mom bod or whatever adj you want to use to describe human bodies
• Happily married with two small humans and one small dog, practicing ENM
• Bisexual, demisexual, sapiosexual
• Not religious, but spiritual, kinda?
• Love music, documentaries, college football, and saying the f bomb A LOT
• Authentically human, open minded, and genuine in trying to stay positive in my thoughts and feels
• Trying to do this nutrition and fitness thing, but man, 4:30 workouts suck and I never can meet my protein goals...but hey, I'm trying!
• 420 and whiskey friendly, cause the world is hard
• Loquacious and witty by default, and I use a lot of GIFs and sarcasm....been described as a sassy/smarty pants 👖 although, I would prefer to be a sassy/smarty dress with pockets 👗

About You:

• Ages 29-40
• Open to or practicing ENM
• Looking for an organic connection, building a foundation of friendship first to see what happens naturally
• Willing to share images fairly early on to see if there is a mutual attraction
• Values knowledge, being open to new ideas, and genuine discourse
• Honest and authentic to yourself and with others
• Humor is one of your strengths -- laughing is the quickest way to connect for me!
• Must be available to actually chat...one word messages twice a day, don't count -- sorry, boo
• Must be willing to move off Reddit if we connect cause in the words of Jean-Ralphio...Reddit chat is "the WOOOOORSTTTTT"

So if this post stuck out of the crowd to you, shoot me a chat request or a message and tell me how you connected with it and then tell me about you (easier said than done, I know). 😊 I've got time, will do my absolute best to not waste yours, as long as you do the same in return.

Waving away the smoke from the poof. I did it. I made you stop scrolling. Takes a bow. I'll share a secret with you. Lean over to me please. I'm not really a magician. That said, I do have super powers. I'd like your undivided attention. You should pause your show, take a quick sip of your coffee, tea, and turn down your song. I hope your not baking, or driving while reading this. I'll wait thirty seconds and let you get comfortable. Cue Jeopardy music.
Ready now? Assuming you said yes. Here we go! I got you to stop scrolling, and I asked for your undivided attention. Now, I have to deliver an amazing post. Rolling around my neck. Clockwise and then counterclockwise. One round of head, shoulders, knees, and toes. All warmed up. Look at you. You're already laughing, smiling, or at least smirking. Damn, I'm good. I'm modest too. wink-wink
Fiddle sticks, where was I. Oh I know, my super powers. For starters, I can pick perfect avocados every time. I'll wait while you re-read the previous sentence. Every single time, perfect avocados. The key is to...no way I'm telling you my secret, well not yet. That's one of my super powers. Sit down please, before I share my second super power. Cue Jeopardy music, again. Now that you're seated. I haven't lost a single sock in over a decade. I'll stop "bragging" for now. I'm modest, remember.
How about some randomness. What section of Target is your favorite? Last song you blasted in the car? Go-to karaoke song? We'll dance and sing while cooking. Nature is my happy place, especially the water. I find it therapeutic. Nothing, like the smell of rain before it actually rains. I'm a PPD (Proud Plant Dad). Plants teach me so much about me and life. I mentioned my super powers, so it's only right I mention my kryptonite. You wouldn't hold it against me right. Sushi...it's Sushi. That's my kryptonite. You should probably buy a portable charger. You'll need it with all the songs, meme, gifs, music, and dad jokes we'll be sending each other. You should probably get back to your movie, baking/cooking, prep for the work week etc. Let's simply chat. No rush, no pressure. Talk to you soon.

Waving away the smoke from the poof. I did it. I made you stop scrolling. Takes a bow. I'll share a secret with you. Lean over to me please. I'm not really a magician. That said, I do have super powers. I'd like your undivided attention. You should pause your show, take a quick sip of your coffee, tea, and turn down your song. I hope your not baking, or driving while reading this. I'll wait thirty seconds and let you get comfortable. Cue Jeopardy music.
Ready now? Assuming you said yes. Here we go! I got you to stop scrolling, and I asked for your undivided attention. Now, I have to deliver an amazing post. Rolling around my neck. Clockwise and then counterclockwise. One round of head, shoulders, knees, and toes. All warmed up. Look at you. You're already laughing, smiling, or at least smirking. Damn, I'm good. I'm modest too. wink-wink
Fiddle sticks, where was I. Oh I know, my super powers. For starters, I can pick perfect avocados every time. I'll wait while you re-read the previous sentence. Every single time, perfect avocados. The key is to...no way I'm telling you my secret, well not yet. That's one of my super powers. Sit down please, before I share my second super power. Cue Jeopardy music, again. Now that you're seated. I haven't lost a single sock in over a decade. I'll stop "bragging" for now. I'm modest, remember.
How about some randomness. What section of Target is your favorite? Last song you blasted in the car? Go-to karaoke song? We'll dance and sing while cooking. Nature is my happy place, especially the water. I find it therapeutic. Nothing, like the smell of rain before it actually rains. I'm a PPD (Proud Plant Dad). Plants teach me so much about me and life. I mentioned my super powers, so it's only right I mention my kryptonite. You wouldn't hold it against me right. Sushi...it's Sushi. That's my kryptonite. You should probably buy a portable charger. You'll need it with all the songs, meme, gifs, music, and dad jokes we'll be sending each other. You should probably get back to your movie, baking/cooking, prep for the work week etc. Let's simply chat. No rush, no pressure. Talk to you soon.

Waving away the smoke from the poof. I did it. I made you stop scrolling. Takes a bow. I'll share a secret with you. Lean over to me please. I'm not really a magician. That said, I do have super powers. I'd like your undivided attention. You should pause your show, take a quick sip of your coffee, tea, and turn down your song. I hope your not baking, or driving while reading this. I'll wait thirty seconds and let you get comfortable. Cue Jeopardy music.
Ready now? Assuming you said yes. Here we go! I got you to stop scrolling, and I asked for your undivided attention. Now, I have to deliver an amazing post. Rolling around my neck. Clockwise and then counterclockwise. One round of head, shoulders, knees, and toes. All warmed up. Look at you. You're already laughing, smiling, or at least smirking. Damn, I'm good. I'm modest too. wink-wink
Fiddle sticks, where was I. Oh I know, my super powers. For starters, I can pick perfect avocados every time. I'll wait while you re-read the previous sentence. Every single time, perfect avocados. The key is to...no way I'm telling you my secret, well not yet. That's one of my super powers. Sit down please, before I share my second super power. Cue Jeopardy music, again. Now that you're seated. I haven't lost a single sock in over a decade. I'll stop "bragging" for now. I'm modest, remember.
How about some randomness. What section of Target is your favorite? Last song you blasted in the car? Go-to karaoke song? We'll dance and sing while cooking. Nature is my happy place, especially the water. I find it therapeutic. Nothing, like the smell of rain before it actually rains. I'm a PPD (Proud Plant Dad). Plants teach me so much about me and life. I mentioned my super powers, so it's only right I mention my kryptonite. You wouldn't hold it against me right. Sushi...it's Sushi. That's my kryptonite. You should probably buy a portable charger. You'll need it with all the songs, meme, gifs, music, and dad jokes we'll be sending each other. You should probably get back to your movie, baking/cooking, prep for the work week etc. Let's simply chat. No rush, no pressure. Talk to you soon.

Waving away the smoke from the poof. I did it. I made you stop scrolling. Takes a bow. I'll share a secret with you. Lean over to me please. I'm not really a magician. That said, I do have super powers. I'd like your undivided attention. You should pause your show, take a quick sip of your coffee, tea, and turn down your song. I hope your not baking, or driving while reading this. I'll wait thirty seconds and let you get comfortable. Cue Jeopardy music.
Ready now? Assuming you said yes. Here we go! I got you to stop scrolling, and I asked for your undivided attention. Now, I have to deliver an amazing post. Rolling around my neck. Clockwise and then counterclockwise. One round of head, shoulders, knees, and toes. All warmed up. Look at you. You're already laughing, smiling, or at least smirking. Damn, I'm good. I'm modest too. wink-wink
Fiddle sticks, where was I. Oh I know, my super powers. For starters, I can pick perfect avocados every time. I'll wait while you re-read the previous sentence. Every single time, perfect avocados. The key is to...no way I'm telling you my secret, well not yet. That's one of my super powers. Sit down please, before I share my second super power. Cue Jeopardy music, again. Now that you're seated. I haven't lost a single sock in over a decade. I'll stop "bragging" for now. I'm modest, remember.
How about some randomness. What section of Target is your favorite? Last song you blasted in the car? Go-to karaoke song? We'll dance and sing while cooking. Nature is my happy place, especially the water. I find it therapeutic. Nothing, like the smell of rain before it actually rains. I'm a PPD (Proud Plant Dad). Plants teach me so much about me and life. I mentioned my super powers, so it's only right I mention my kryptonite. You wouldn't hold it against me right. Sushi...it's Sushi. That's my kryptonite. You should probably buy a portable charger. You'll need it with all the songs, meme, gifs, music, and dad jokes we'll be sending each other. You should probably get back to your movie, baking/cooking, prep for the work week etc. Let's simply chat. No rush, no pressure. Talk to you soon.

So I've noticed an influx of new people coming to the search recently and wanted to make a guide of where to start with saki, a lot of old and debunked leads have been popping back up so lets clear some of them up.
​
If you are brand new to the search I'd recommend starting with the Whang! videos then coming back here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEPveDQXNXg&list=PLU_4_X2epTdAu0-eR-jOXCHHRPAGR0Qf-
​
​
The one i've seen mentioned the most is lady in the sea of blood, we have since found a full catalogue of the studios work and saki is not related to them in anyway.
Can be found here: https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/727382499474276403/907931271332761630/EEE05DF0-A169-49C5-B775-9BE00ABBFA43.jpg?width=441&height=670
​
​
The next one I've seen a lot is the leads faked by Chris Able:
https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/ivel8e/current_state_of_the_gfap_community/
https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/j13wym/updates_on_shareyourworld_screenshots_and_mouse/
Everything in these 2 posts have been debunked, if you dont wanna read through them here is a tldr of what is debunked
Darkanimeinc
Twistedanger
This screenshot: https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/727382499474276403/1114230105988923474/IMG_5557.png?width=1035&height=670
Lady in the sea of blood as mentioned in the last part
Mouse pet special/Dream Film Corps
​
​
Next up are the leads found by f_neo, this has already been addressed in the discord but I haven't seen it on the reddit yet so here is the full message debunking him:
" As many of you know,an user who was part of the first Saki discord has recently created a new saki server,his reasoning is that we debunked some of the evidence that F_Neo claimed he found on Perfect Dark (a japanese p2p program) and that we were wrong in doing so,therefore we will show here the 2 main leads that F_Neo claimed he found on Perfect Dark 1st lead: He claimed he found this image on perfect dark https://i.4pcdn.org/x/1574968485857.png
As some of you who speak japanese would notice that some of the japanese characters that appear in this image are sideways,this is impossible to do if you type the characters so the only possible explanation is that he altered the image to make it appear as if it says something different. 2nd Lead: He claimed that the image of the white hair girl and the image with the white background that reads What are your dreams for the future?" where found by him on Perfect Dark in a file named "ママヤングガ_ランダム.gzip" The first suspicious thing is the gzip extension as Kudojin pointed out "Most Japanese anonymous p2p programs are made only for Windows, and .gzip is a compression format invented originally as a replacement for compress on UNIX OS's. UNIX OS's are stuff like Linux and macOS. So, gzip is a very uncommon file format to find on these file sharing programs." The second suspicious thing about the gzip file is that the name of the file has no meaning and its just giberish,the third suspicious thing about the gzip file is that as Kudojin pointed out "the entire file name is in katakana, which is also rare for Japanese writing.Katakana, in the modern era, is usually reserved for loan-words from non-East Asian languages." That bears the question which kind of phrase F_Neo used to find this file with a katakana name and a gzip extension.
When it comes to his claims that he was able to connect to PD,to connect you need a list of working nodes,the best way to get them is if you speak japanese and ask about them in either 5chan or 2chan,you can also get them from the web but those have not been updated in years due to legislations in japan and also due to the fact that no one really uses P2P programs anymore. When he connected to PD he was the only one who could connect and since he didnt share the list of nodes he used no one could verify the claims he made about the files he found on there,leaving his whole PD adventure open to interpretation and with no way of verifying it. Finally as some of you may know,F_Neo deleted his discord account after claiming he was harassed and sent death threats and illegal material to his email,we have no way of verifying or deniying this claims.This means we have no way of contacting him regarding the manipulated "go punch.avi" image or the gibberish gzip file written in katakana. Therefore as of right now the "go punch.avi" image has been debunked as a fake lead,and the gzip file as suspicious but not fully debunked.The 2 images he claims he found inside the gzip file,the first one of the white hair girl has been debunked already as part of the "Ghost Stories OVA" the second one "What are your dreams for the future" still hasnt been found and we still dont know where it came from. That is all left to say about the whole f_neo situation,Please do not harass the owner of the new server if you do so you will be removed from this server."
​
And here's is a full list of debunked media that is confirmed NOT to be saki

1. 1- Midori Shoujo Tsubaki (anime/manga) 2- Umezu Kazuo no Noroi (anime OVA) 3- Gakkou no Yuurei (anime OVA) 4- Violence Jack (anime/manga) 5- Devilman (anime/manga) 6- Mistery highschool (Gakuen Nanafushigi) (anime) 7- Yami Shibai (anime) 8- Lullaby to the sleep of Death (anime) 9- Limitless Paradise ( lost anime too, but not Saki) 10- Brain Damage (manga only) 11- Corpse Party (anime/games) 12- Another (anime) 13- Angel beats (anime) 14- Hanako-san (multiple anime/manga and games related) 15- Mermaid forest (anime) 16- Euphoria (anime) 17- Digital devil story : Megami tensei (Anime OVA) 18- Taito monogatari (Anime OVA) 19- Any Junji Ito's work (Anime/manga) 20- Boogiepop Phantom (Anime) 21- Mezzo Forte (Anime) 22- joshikousei sankaku emaki (Rx Manga) 23- Nichijou (Anime) 24- Battle Royale High School (Anime OVA) 25- Dark (Rx OVA) 26- Desert Island Story XX (Rx OVA) 27- Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni (Anime) 28- Call me tonight (Anime OVA) 29- Fruits Version (Anime) 30- Hells target (Anime OVA) 31- Kimera (Anime OVA) 32- Tomie (manga) 33- Uzumaki (manga) 34- Crimson Climax (Rx Hentai) 35- Bride of Deimos (Anime OVA) 36- A wind named amnesia (Anime movie) 37- Hell girl (Anime) 38- Makaryuudo Demon hunter (Anime OVA) 39- Devil Hunter Yohko (Anime OVA) 40- Dark Cat (Anime OVA) 41- The drifting Clasroom (Manga) 42- Dream hunter Rem (Anime) 43- The Gakuen Choujotai (Anime OVA) 44- The laughing target (anime OVA) 45- Angel Cop (Anime OVA) 46- A-Kite (OVA) 47- Ghost Stories (Anime) 48- Perfect Blue (Anime Movie) 49- anything from Orange Video House ( defunct adult anime studio) (edited) 50- anything from Magic Bus (Defunct anime studio) 51- Cream Lemon (adult OVA series) 52-Lemon Angel 53-Urotsukidoji (OVA series) 54-Slave sisters (Adult OVA series) 55-My My Mai (OVA) 56-Cool Devices 57-Yajikita Gakuen Douchuuki 58 - Blood-C 59 - Gakkou Ga Kowai 61-Hengen Taima Yakou Karura Mau (OVA and movies) 60 - Gakkou de Atta Kowai Hanashi 62-Bishoujo Animerama series 63- Zankekikan (惨剧馆) Tragedy Hall (10 volume horror manga) 64-Nusumareta Houkago (2 volume horror shoujo manga) 65-Ushiro no Hyakutaro OVA 66-De Vadasy OVA
2. Authors : 1- Go Nagai 2- Junji Ito 3- Hiroshi Harada 4- Suehiro Maruo 5- Kazuo Umezu 6- Shin Misawa 7- Pizza Yorozu 8- teQteQ

​
​
Now that we've gotten through all the debunked stuff here is how you CAN help the search moving forward:
1.The Head Bashing gif:
there has been multiple accounts of a gif that is very similar to saki that has yet to be found, here are the main threads of this lead:
https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/juptj0/im_convinced_ive_seen_a_gif_of_saki_sanobashi/ https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/jutpuq/a_follow_up_on_my_last_post_this_is_a_quick/ https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/jvgtjz/a_second_follow_up_to_my_gifposting_was/ https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/jvj2dm/the_final_gif_follow_up_for_now_my_friend_who/
https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/jw3myd/gifposting_update/
https://www.reddit.com/SakisanNoBashitsu/comments/jxzpke/gifposting_ruling_out_tumbl
​

1. VK:

VK is a Russian social media platform that has been proven to have rare and obscure anime and media from the timeframe that saki is supposed to be from, no major leads has came out of this yet but it is still worth looking through if you are interested.
​
​
​
Hopefully this is all easy to understand, I'm not very good at writing and formatting big posts but it should be enough to get the gist of the current state of the search, if i forgot anything please let me know and I'll update this post as needed.
here is the discord if anyone is interested: https://discord.gg/V8Yr5w22Vh

I’m a married guy who’s realised very late in the piece that most of his friends:
(a) were his wife’s friends first; and (b) probably wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire.
Therefore, there’s several vacancies going in the entourage at the moment. We can start off with messages and chat here, then move somewhere else (Telegram/Discord/some other third thing) if we feel so inclined. At the moment, I’m really just looking for people (preferably female, 40-55) to chat with about random stuff - if we end up meeting in person, that’d be great, but it’s not the end of the world if our friendship is largely restricted to memes and GIFs.
Hobbies and interests include: movies (anything that can make me laugh - bonus points for car chases, explosions, and cameo appearances by Godzilla), music (pretty much everything except C&W), community radio, theatre, drinking more coffee than is remotely healthy, and lifting things down from high shelves for people shorter than me.
I tend to be a bit on the shy side at first, but once I feel comfortable with a new person, I like to think I’m fun to have around. My sense of humour can be a bit strange at times, but I try to keep that in check until I’m sure of my audience.
Thanks for reading this far - I hope to hear from you.

I’m a married guy who’s realised very late in the piece that most of his friends:
(a) were his wife’s friends first; and (b) probably wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire.
Therefore, there’s several vacancies going in the entourage at the moment. We can start off with messages and chat here, then move somewhere else (Telegram/Discord/some other third thing) if we feel so inclined. At the moment, I’m really just looking for people (preferably female, 40-55) to chat with about random stuff - if we end up meeting in person, that’d be great, but it’s not the end of the world if our friendship is largely restricted to memes and GIFs.
Hobbies and interests include: movies (anything that can make me laugh - bonus points for car chases, explosions, and cameo appearances by Godzilla), music (pretty much everything except C&W), community radio, theatre, drinking more coffee than is remotely healthy, and lifting things down from high shelves for people shorter than me.
I tend to be a bit on the shy side at first, but once I feel comfortable with a new person, I like to think I’m fun to have around. My sense of humour can be a bit strange at times, but I try to keep that in check until I’m sure of my audience.
Thanks for reading this far - I hope to hear from you.

Hey there honorary Justice League members - it’s a new week which means it’s time for a new discussion thread!

• Floss' pick of the week: The Flash #800

For those who don't know: the way this works is that several comments will list this week’s releases, for any given title discussion you should respond to that comment. For example, Wonder Woman discussion would go in the replies to the "Wonder Woman" comment. Clicking the titles in this post will take you directly to that comment, too.
In other words, you should only be replying to other comments. If you have trouble understanding how to comment for a particular title, please refer to this handy guide. Any unwarranted top level comments will be removed.
Also, please refrain from posting short, low-content comments on threads for issues or episodes that have not yet been released. Put some effort to generate discussion. Instead of just posting "So excited!" or "Best book!", try something with a bit more substance, like "Punchline is such an amazing character! Can't wait to see how they explore her in more depth in this issue."
Join the Monthly Book Club! This month's book is Batman/Superman: The Archive of Worlds and you can join the discussion right now here!
 
QUICK LINKS: Weekly Meta Discussions Thread Current jump-in points Weekly Discussion Archives Monthly Book Club Discord Server Twitter Last Week's Thread
^{If a pig loses its voice, does it become disgruntled?}

DC and Imprints

^{All your light hearted favourites like Wally West, Scooby Doo, and the Joker}

• Adventures of Superman: Jon Kent #4
• Batman #136
• Dark Knights of Steel #11
• The Flash #800
• The Joker: The Man Who Stopped Laughing #9
• The Joker: Uncovered #1
• New Talent Showcase: The Milestone Initiative #1
• Peacemaker Tries Hard! #2
• Poison Ivy #13
• Scooby-Doo, Where Are You? #122
• Shazam! #2
• Steelworks #1

Trade Collections

^{Wonder Woman Historia hardcover the same week as the Kelly Sue DeConnick AMA? What are the chances!}

• Batman: Fortress [HC]
• *Fann Club: Batman Squad
• History of the DC Universe [HC]
• Nightwing - Vol. 1, Leaping into the Light [TP]
• Wonder Woman Historia: The Amazons [HC]

Digital Releases

^{Remember, these are the short 'chapters' with a new chapter of a different series coming out daily. You can learn more here on Comixology. This is also why these are in release order, not alphabetical. Some comics may release on DC Universe Infinite or WEBTOONS.}

• Monday, 6/5 (WEBTOON) - Red Hood: Outlaws #43
  
• Tuesday, 6/6 (WEBTOON) - Zatanna & the Ripper #48
  
• Thursday, 6/8 (WEBTOON) - Batman: Wayne Family Adventures #86
  
• Friday, 6/9 (WEBTOON) - Vixen: NYC #55
  

TV Shows

^{complicated daddy issues}

• Tuesday, 6/6: Superman & Lois S03E11 - Complications
• Tuesday, 6/6: Gotham Knights S01E11 - Daddy Issues

^{This Week’s Soundtrack: Leonard Cohen - Dance Me to the End of Love}

This legendary saga goes by the name of CUM: How I Totally Roasted the Bullies with my own orgasm"
Alright, let me introduce myself. The name's Ethan, but you can call me the CUM Master Supreme.
Picture this: I was a regular dude, stuck in a world of relentless bullying.
Those jerks at school thought they could push me around, but little did they know I had a secret weapon up my sleeve.
So, one fine sunny day, I'm strutting my stuff on the way home, when suddenly, a genius idea hits me like a lightning bolt.
I'm talking about a move so audacious, so ridiculously epic, that it would make the internet explode with laughter.
The next day, as the bullies gather like a bunch of wannabe tough guys near the town square, I put my plan into action.
I took a deep breath, summoned the power of anime girl hardcore hentai and unleashed my big and white cock that shook the very foundations of the street.
The bullies? They didn't know what hit 'em! Their faces twisted in horror, their mouths agape like they just witnessed the birth of a God.
My dick was broken, I sprained my own back. I came so fucking hard...
People passing by couldn't help but lose it, laughing their butts off and whipping out their phones to capture photos of my dripping cock.
Word spread like wildfire, folks.
The story of how Ethan, the CUM Master Supreme, put those bullies in their place with a cock-blasting white liquid, reached every corner of the town.
Memes were created, GIFs were shared, and the internet went into a frenzy. The cum 'round the world became a legend, a symbol of triumph against the bullies.
And guess what? The bullies never messed with me again.
They learned their lesson the hard way. My epic semen gave them a reality check like no other.
They realized that beneath the surface of a seemingly ordinary kid lies the power to stand up and fight back, even with something as silly as cumming.
So, my friends, remember this tale of mine. Let it be a reminder that in this crazy 21st century world, sometimes the most absurd and unexpected acts can be the ones that change everything.
Don't be afraid to unleash your inner CUM Master Supreme and show the world what you're made of.
And always remember, a well-timed CUM can be the ultimate weapon to vanquish the darkness. Stay goofy, my friends!

As we all know this show's marketing is kind of horrible. At this point it might look like the only people that are gonna pull up to watch HH are those who knew it from the pilot and there won't be a lot of new viewers. But that's all beside the point.
In the most recent monthly update, we had a GIF of Alastor laughing his ass off in front of the hotel with a sign that says "Now Playing". Now, what if that's not a scene from one of the episodes but from the trailer, but when will that said trailer release? My guess is on this Tuesday, June 6th and if there'll actually be a trailer dropping that day I think it'll be around 6 am or pm in pst.
Why do I think that? Well because that specific date and time makes the number 666, whiwh is know to be a demonic number and since the show takes place in Hell... I don't see why they wouldn't go for that. Another reason is because of instead of posting a patch of Gifs herself, Vivziepop decided to post the same one with the caption: "Heehee". This probably means nothing to you but to me it looks like she's up to something.
That is all.

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worldnews

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news

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Tennessee federal judge rules 'drag ban' is unconstitutional
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science

• MistWeaver80

Study supports the use of anti-poverty programmes such as cash transfers to improve population health. Researchers found that cash transfer programmes were associated with significant reductions in mortality among children under five years of age and women.
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Escalated police stops of Black men are linguistically and psychologically distinct in their earliest moments
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People with heightened sexual nostalgia tend to also have heightened sexual satisfaction, according to new research. The results indicate that the positive association between sexual nostalgia and satisfaction is particularly strong among insecurely attached individuals.
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space

• Davicho77

Milky Way over a Turquoise Wonderland. Credits: Petr Horálek / Institute of Physics in Opava.
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Jupiter seen from the James Webb Space Telescope
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NASA's Mars helicopter is somehow still flying - and playing hide-and-seek
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Delegates working to end global plastics pollution agree to craft a draft treaty
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Artificial Intelligence Will Entrench Global Inequality - The debate about regulating AI urgently needs input from the global south.
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• Gari_305

Experts issue a dire warning about AI and encourage limits be imposed
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AskReddit

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If your penis made a noise every time it got hard, what would you want the noise to be?
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What’s something (besides your phone) that you take with you everywhere?
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What will always be dirty no matter how often it's cleaned?
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todayilearned

• romansapprentice

TIL that Steve Jobs is buried in an unmarked grave
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TIL that an American POW in World War 2 was questioned about US atomic bombs after the bombing of Hiroshima. He told them he didn't know anything about that, but when they threatened to kill them, he "revealed" they had hundreds and that Tokyo and Kyoto were next.
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• UralIveGotTonight

TIL that the legs of the 630 foot 192 m) Gateway Arch in St. Louis, MO had to be built with a 1/64” (0.4 mm) tolerance so that they would meet at the top. Several filmmakers documented the entire construction in hope that the legs wouldn’t meet.
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dataisbeautiful

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[OC] The entire history of Premier League teams in one chart ⚽️📈
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More than 50% of Vienna's Area is closer than 2km to a metro station [OC]
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What can an air fryer do that an oven can’t?
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Want to make queso that's dippable regardless of temperature, like the store-bought stuff? Use sodium citrate and corn starch.
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[homemade] lemon curd and blueberry pancakes.
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[I ate] pulpitos
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[homemade] cheddar cheese biscuits
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movies

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Walt Disney's Pixar Targets 'Lightyear' Execs Among 75 Job Cuts
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Contact (1997)
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What is one seemingly insignificant scene or character in a movie that you just can't get out of your mind?
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Touched A Nerve, Jon Silent (Me), Ink and Acrylic, 2023
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Pluto, Dracopuella (me), digital, 2023
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Middle of nowhere, Naif(me), Pixelart, 2023
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television

• Neo2199

Julie Plec and More WGA Members Detail Writers Strike Negotiations, Demand Streamers to Release Ratings: ‘We’re Mad’
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• Neo2199

‘Full Monty’ Actor Reveals He Was Sacked From Disney TV Series After A Female Runner Saw Him Naked In Trailer
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• verissimoallan

'House of the Dragon’ Star Olivia Cooke Is Totally Fine if You Don’t Like Alicent: ‘That’s the Beauty of What We Do’
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pics

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Senator John Fetterman at Pride parade.
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Reunion of the cast of The Mighty Ducks
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My parents 46 year old blender still works like new
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Paula Abdul fatality
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Nest with a 360° view
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Just lay back and relax
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mildlyinteresting

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I’m at the NYC Macys and the escalator is made out of wood.
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• stevieisbored

A small local movie theater me uses reusable metal bowls for the popcorn
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• JukeBoxDildo

Rabdomly found a TARDIS in somebody's front yard.
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interestingasfuck

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*Squirrel trying to fake an injury *
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• xliarliarx

Man puts 10ft buggy wheels on a Tesla and drives it upside down
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• lshic

Never Forget what happened in China 34 years ago: Remembering the fearless Demonstrators at the 1989 Tiananmen Square Protests
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funny

• LaughBakery

Thats not why you get cats
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• thiscoper

One of them is very smart
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• Allerweltsname

Cat carries mouse to food bowl
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aww

• AcceptableOffice

Potato requires belly scratches
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• esberat

Cute Child Comforts Adorable, Nervous, Puppy
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• abhigoswami18

Puppy fall asleep during the meditation session.
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Context What's up oiler bros, it's your friendly Florida gutter child. I was on Tinder earlier, because of last night, and I matched with this girl, and one thing led to another, and she said "What could be better than touching my ass ;)." I said "The Florida Panthers winning the Stanley cup." She didn't like that, but I was like dude I love hockey my bad!, "Well maybe you should find a girl who knows hockey, cause I don't."
I kinda laughed it off, I was like its easy to learn, plus lot of good looking dudes. Like Leon Draisaitl. Handsome dude. I sent like two Gifs. okay it was actually three Im sorry he's handsome the fuck am I supposed to about that? Tell me to be great at hockey but ugly? So I picked up my phone and noticed she unmatched my ass.
I regret nothing!

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Hello 3d6! I’ve been working on this character theorycraft for a while now, and I’ve quite nearly accomplished my goal — only to fall barely short at the final 1%. I’m sharing it now in a 99-percent-complete state, for everyone to enjoy reading my mad scientist ravings, or to offer their own suggestions on how to wring out just a little bit more damage to finally have a character that can kill any creature in a single punch.
tl;dr: a theorycrafted level 20 Saitama character can deal 634 damage on average in a single punch, instantly killing 99% of all published monsters (27 28 monsters can survive).

The self-imposed rules

• Must be RAW.
• All printed magic items are allowed, and random properties may be chosen.
• Average rolls will be used for ability checks, attacks, and damage rolls.
• All the damage must be dealt in a single punch attack: damage that happens after the resolution of the attack does not count (poisons, damage on a later turn, etc.)
• Any amount of preparation time for the single punch is allowed.
• No friends — all the preparation must be done by the single character. No buff spells may be cast by other people.
• Bonus points if everything can be explained within One-Punch Man’s canon lore.

Now, let’s get into it!

Race

Protector Aasimar. Saitama claims to be an ordinary man, but let’s be honest, to have such ludicrous power, he must be more than human. Aasimar are more or less human, but with a touch of the divine, which fits the bill perfectly.Mechanically, we’re choosing this for the Radiant Soul option: as an action once per long rest, they transform for 1 minute and once per turn can deal their level in radiant damage to one target of an attack. At level 20, this will add +20 radiant damage to the punch, by far the highest single-attack damage boost of any racial ability.

Stats

Saitama has incredible strength, speed, reflexes, and durability, which he attributes to an intense training regimen. How could he have gotten such formidable training? Well, perhaps he read the instructions in a magic book. The Manuals of Gainful Exercise, Quickness of Action, and Bodily Health are very rare magic items that describe “fitness exercises,” “coordination and balance exercises,” and “health and diet tips” with words that are charged with magic. Studying these manuals and practicing their guidelines for 48 hours increases a creature’s STR, DEX, and CON stats by 2, as well as increasing their maximum for that score — up to a cap of 30. Clearly, to have such godlike strength, dexterity, and constitution, Saitama’s intense training must have included reading as many Manuals as necessary to raise his STR, DEX, and CON stats each to a godlike 30.This results in Saitama having a +10 to STR attack and damage rolls, a +10 boost to DEX checks like stealth and initiative, and a ridiculous amount of hit points.In order to multiclass, Saitama will also need at least a 13 in INT, WIS, and CHA — which should be achievable.

Classes

Saitama starts by taking three levels in Armorer Artificer, which gives him a suit of Arcane Armor that expands to cover his entire body and can be used as a spellcasting focus for artificer spells. The text describes “metallurgical pursuits,” but nothing RAW forbids one from choosing a suit of yellow leather armor for Arcane Armor. At AC 11 + DEX, this gives Saitama an AC of 21 — which doesn’t really matter, since he can kill nearly anything in a single punch before it ever has a chance of attacking him.We choose the Guardian Armor Model for Saitama’s Arcane Armor, causing the red rubber gloves on his leather armor to be counted as Thunder Gauntlets: they count as simple melee weapons when not holding anything in them, and deal 1d8 thunder damage on a hit. Saitama also has the option to use his INT modifier instead of STR or DEX when attacking with the gauntlets, but let’s be honest, he’s going to stick with his godlike +10 STR modifier here.Saitama will infuse his gloves with the Enhanced Weapon artificer infusion, giving them a +1 to attack and damage rolls, and turning them into a magic item.From Armorer, Saitama also learns the spells Booming Blade and Absorb Elements.To complete Saitama’s armor, he also gains a white Cloak of Billowing (a common magic item that does not require attunement) and a pair of red rubber Boots of Elvenkind (an uncommon magic item that also does not require attunement, and gives advantage on Stealth checks to move silently).
Next, Saitama takes nine levels in warlock. He chooses the Hexblade patron and Pact of the Blade, and gains the Hexblade’s Curse, the Eldritch Smite invocation, and the Banishing Smite spell from the Hexblade expanded spell list. He will also transform his gloves into his pact weapon, and take the Improved Pact Weapon invocation, allowing him to use his gloves as a spellcasting focus for warlock spells. Unfortunately, because his gloves are already a magic weapon with a +1 to attack and damage rolls from the Enhanced Weapon artificer infusion, they do not gain an additional +1 to attack and damage rolls from Improved Pact Weapon.Hexblade’s Curse allows Saitama to curse a creature within 30 feet for 1 minute as a bonus action, and add his proficiency bonus to damage rolls against that target.Eldritch Smite deals 1d8 force damage plus another 1d8 for each level of warlock spell slot expended when hitting a creature with one’s pact weapon. At a maximum 5th level spell slot, this adds 6d8 force damage to his punch.Banishing Smite activates as a bonus action and consumes concentration for 1 minute to add an extra 5d10 force damage on the next hit with a weapon attack. Additionally, if the target then has 50 HP or less, it is banished to its home plane (or until the spell ends).At nine levels in Warlock, Saitama gets two 5th-level spell slots per short rest. This is just enough for one usage of Eldritch Smite and one casting of Banishing Smite. However, he will then have to rest before going out to fight villains again — perhaps a good reason for why he spends so much time relaxing at home playing video games and reading manga.Saitama also gets two ASIs at his fourth and eighth levels of warlock. At these levels, he will take the Martial Adept and Fey Touched feats. The Martial Adept feat gives him a d6 superiority die and two maneuvers, one of which will be Menacing Attack (the other does not matter). Menacing Attack adds the d6 to the damage of the attack and forces the target to make a WIS save or be frightened (and though our goal is to kill the target outright, if it somehow survives, Saitama’s DC will be a difficult-to-surmount 24: 8 + 6 [proficiency bonus] + 10 [STR mod]). From the Fey Touched feat, Saitama will learn the first-level divination spell Gift of Alacrity, which lasts 8 hours without concentration and adds 1d8 to his initiative rolls.
To kill creatures in a single punch, Saitama will need to train to Assassinate: taking four levels in Assassin Rogue. Assassinate gives Saitama advantage on attacks against creatures that have not yet taken a turn in combat, and automatic critical hits on creatures who are surprised. In order to surprise creatures, Saitama will need to succeed on a Stealth check contested by the target’s Perception: “Any character or monster that doesn't notice a threat is surprised at the start of the encounter.” Saitama rarely sneaks up on his targets, but usually allows them to monologue for a long time before annihilating them with a single punch. It is his unremarkable appearance that allows him to take his enemies by surprise — and perhaps that appearance is its own form of stealth. Just to make getting surprise mechanically possible, Saitama will take an Expertise in Stealth, to double his proficiency for a +12 to Stealth in addition to his +10 DEX modifier. Due to his red rubber Boots of Elvenkind, he will also get advantage on Stealth checks made to move silently.With a +22 to Stealth, on an average d20 roll of 13.825 (with advantage), a Stealth of 35.825 should allow him to defeat the passive perception of nearly every monster — even the Greatwyrms, which have a passive perception of only 32. Tiamat has a passive perception of 36, and as the monster with the highest passive perception, she is the only monster capable of successfully noticing Saitama’s threat (unless he gets a little lucky with the Stealth roll). If we really want to ensure that Saitama can go undetected, we could give him the Epic Boon of Undetectability for an additional +10 to Stealth checks and immunity to detection or targeting by divination magic.He will also need to beat his target on an initiative roll to be able to get an automatic critical hit — which is why he will take the Alert feat on his fourth level of rogue, giving him a +5 to initiative rolls in addition to the +10 from his DEX modifier. As the only bonus monsters get to initiative is from their DEX modifier (and the highest DEX modifier that any monster has is +9, for the Elder Tempest or Will-o’-Wisp), with a total +6 edge from the +5 from Alert and his +10 DEX modifier, as well as +1d8 from Gift of Alacrity, Saitama will beat even the fastest monsters’ initiative rolls 89% of the time (and a later item will increase this to 97%).
When Saitama uses a Serious Punch, it’s like sending the target on a Path to their Grave. Thus, Saitama will take two levels in Grave Cleric. As an action, Path to the Grave allows Saitama to choose “another creature’s life force for termination.” The next time he hits the chosen creature within 30 feet with an attack, the creature has vulnerability to all of the attack’s damage, causing the damage to be doubled (as long as the creature is not immune or resistant to any of the damage types).
Lastly, Saitama will take two levels in paladin, gaining Divine Smite and the Dueling fighting style.When hitting with a melee weapon attack, he can expend a spell slot to Divine Smite, dealing additional radiant damage to the target. At three levels of artificer, two levels of cleric, and two levels of paladin, Saitama is a fifth-level multiclassed caster (his three levels from artificer are halved and rounded up to two, cleric gives two levels, and two levels of paladin is halved to one, for a total of five). This gives him two 3rd-level spell slots per long rest — spending a 3rd level slot on a Divine Smite gives an extra 4d8 radiant damage (1d8 off of the maximum of 5d8 from spending a 4th-level spell). It also deals an extra 1d8 to undead or fiend targets.The Dueling fighting style gives +2 to damage rolls when wielding a melee weapon in one hand and no other weapons. The Thunder Gauntlets count as simple melee weapons when not holding anything in them, so Saitama will hold something in his right hand, leaving him wielding only one Thunder Gauntlet on his left hand when he delivers a Serious Punch. (In One-Punch Man canon, Saitama usually punches with his right hand. For a mechanical reason, our theorycrafted DND Saitama has to punch with his left. Maybe this is why DND Saitama is slightly weaker than canon Saitama, and isn’t able to kill every monster in a single hit.)
With three levels of artificer, nine levels of warlock, four levels of rogue, two levels of cleric, and two levels of paladin, Saitama is a level 20 character.

Feats

As mentioned above, Saitama will take Martial Adept and Fey Touched at his fourth and eighth warlock level, and Alert at his fourth level of rogue.

Additional items

When Saitama strikes someone, it occasionally appears as if he has grown to incredible size (https://tenor.com/view/one-punch-man-gif-23643267). To simulate this, DND Saitama will consume a Potion of Giant Size (legendary) and a Potion of Growth (rare), increasing to Huge for 24 hours and then again to Gargantuan for 1d4 hours. From the Potion of Giant Size, his weapons roll three times as many dice (thus increasing his Thunder Gauntlets to deal 3d8 thunder damage on hit). From the Potion of Growth, Saitama gets advantage on STR checks and saves, and deals 1d4 additional damage on weapon attacks.
Saitama can attune to three magic items. We will choose the Hand of Vecna (legendary), Sword of Kas (legendary), and a Ring of Spell Storing (rare).
To attune to the Hand of Vecna, Saitama had to lop off his left hand at the wrist and replace it with the Hand of Vecna. This withered hand is hidden within his red rubber glove, and (among other properties) allows him to deal an extra 2d8 cold damage when he makes a melee weapon attack with a weapon held in the hand.The Hand of Vecna also includes one minor and one major beneficial property, along with one minor detrimental property. For the major beneficial property, we will choose the property: “When you hit with a weapon attack while attuned to the artifact, the target takes an extra 1d6 damage of the weapon's type.” For the minor beneficial property, we will choose immunity to charm and fear effects. The minor detrimental property we will choose is: “Your appearance changes as the DM decides” — from his intense training regimen (which included chopping off his left hand and replacing it with the Hand of Vecna), Saitama unfortunately lost all of his hair — still a sore spot for him.
The Sword of Kas grants several abilities, but Saitama only attacks with punches, so it will remain in its scabbard, somewhere on his person. While it is on his person, it adds an additional d10 to Saitama’s initiative (raising his probability of having a higher initiative than even a monster with +9 DEX to 97%).The Sword of Kas also includes one minor and one major beneficial property, as well as one minor and one major detrimental property. We will choose the same major beneficial property as the Hand of Vecna, for an extra 1d6 damage when hitting with a weapon attack (typically effects of the same type do not stack. However, since these are generic properties of two artifacts with different names, the properties should stack under RAW). The minor beneficial property can be any (some thematic options include immunity to disease or +1 AC), and the minor detrimental property can be: “The first time you touch a gem or piece of jewelry while attuned to this artifact, the value of the gem or jewelry is reduced by half.” Perhaps this explains why Saitama is poor. The major detrimental property can be taking 8d10 psychic damage when attuning to the Sword of Kas: Saitama mentions that his training was so intense that he thought he might die — perhaps this damage was why it felt so intense. (Note: with eighteen levels in classes with d8 hit dice and two levels of paladin for d10 hit dice, Saitama’s average hit points is 92, not counting the incredible 200 additional HP from his +10 CON modifier. Even at a maximum roll of 80 psychic damage from attuning to Sword of Kas, he wouldn’t actually die.)Interestingly, the Sword of Kas also causes its bearer to gradually become obsessed with destroying anyone corrupted by the Hand of Vecna — this might cause Saitama to become fairly conflicted.
Lastly, the Ring of Spell-Storing. Up to five levels of spells can be stored within, and can be cast while touching the ring. Saitama can spend one of his fifth-level Pact Magic slots to cast Absorb Elements (learned from his levels in artificer) into the ring, before resting to regain his Pact Magic slot. Absorb Elements can be cast as a reaction to elemental damage, grants resistance to the triggering damage, and adds an extra 1d6 of that damage type per spell level when the next time the caster hits with a melee attack on their next turn. Cast at a fifth level, this adds 5d6 elemental damage to Saitama’s punch.To voluntarily trigger the Absorb Elements, we will have Saitama use his free object interaction to stick a finger into a vial of acid held in his right hand (which also makes the Thunder Gauntlet in his right hand no longer count as a melee weapon since it's holding something, thus enabling him to use the Dueling fighting style with his left). The acid will burn Saitama, allowing him to cast Absorb Elements in reaction, getting resistance to the acid damage and charging up 5d6 acid damage to be released on his next melee attack this turn.

Preparation to punch

In order to maximize damage in a single attack, Saitama needs to do some preparation. At some point, he will spend one of his fifth-level Pact Magic slots to cast Absorb Elements into the Ring of Spell Storing, before resting to regain his Pact Magic slot.
On the day of, he must also cast Gift of Alacrity to maximize his initiative rolls (this lasts 8 hours), and spend an action drinking the Potion of Giant Size (which lasts 24 hours). One hour before the fight, he must drink the Potion of Growth (which lasts a minimum of 1 hour). He must also open the vial of acid and hold it ready in his right hand.
A minute before punching his target, he must spend an action to activate his Radiant Soul Aasimar transformation, and spend an action and a bonus action cursing his target with the Hexblade’s Curse and Path to the Grave.
Finally, on the turn he punches, he spends his free object interaction to touch the acid in the vial until it causes damage, then casts Absorb Elements as a reaction from his Ring of Spell Storing. He spends his bonus action casting Banishing Smite, and then his action casting the cantrip Booming Blade. (He has cast three spells in one turn, but the only limitation on casting multiple spells per turn is that if he casts a spell as a bonus action, he may only cast a cantrip — like Booming Blade — with his action.)
Edit (thank you to u/yethegodless for alerting me): I made a mistake with the rules on casting multiple spells on a turn. Saitama would have to cast Banishing Smite on the turn before he punches. Casting a spell with a bonus action casting time not only limits you to casting a cantrip with your action, but also prevents you from casting any other spells (like casting Absorb Elements as a reaction). If he casts Banishing Smite right after activating Hexblade's Curse and Path to the Grave, he has another nine turns to activate the punch. And as long as he doesn't cast a spell with his bonus action, then he can definitely cast Absorb Elements as a reaction and Booming Blade with his action.

The punch

Booming Blade requires a material component: a melee weapon worth at least 1 sp. Normally, using his arcane armor as a spellcasting focus would allow him to ignore material components, but this material component cannot be ignored because it has a cost. The Thunder Gauntlets from a suit of arcane armor have no assigned cost, but the basic leather armor costs 10 gp, so it’s a safe assumption that a magically-enhanced +1 Thunder Gauntlet would cost more than 1 sp.Upon casting the spell, Saitama makes a melee attack against a creature within 5 feet. At level 20, the cantrip adds an extra 3d8 thunder damage to the initial attack, and an additional 4d8 if the target moves on its next turn — but the latter damage will not count for this purpose because our goal is to annihilate the target with the first hit.
Assuming that his stealth and initiative checks have allowed Saitama to surprise his target and go first in the initiative order, he has advantage on his attack from Assassinate and gets +17 to the roll: +6 from his proficiency, +10 from his STR modifier, and +1 from the Enhanced Weapon infusion. The monsters with the highest AC are Tiamat and the Tarrasque, with an AC of 25 — with advantage and a +17 to hit, Saitama has an 88% chance of hitting, and any hit is an automatic critical hit from Assassinate.If a guaranteed hit is desired, we could give Saitama an Epic Boon of Combat Prowess, choosing to hit on a melee weapon attack once per short rest. At that point, the attack roll doesn’t even matter.

Damage

The 1d8 thunder damage from his Thunder Gauntlets is tripled to 3d8 by the Potion of Giant Size. The Gauntlets deal an extra 1d4 thunder damage from the Potion of Growth, an extra 2d6 thunder damage from the major beneficial properties of the Hand of Vecna and the Sword of Kas, and an extra 1d6 thunder damage from the Menacing Attack maneuver. The attack deals an extra 2d8 cold damage because it was made with a weapon wielded by the Hand of Vecna. We add an additional 6d8 force damage from Eldritch Smite, 5d10 force damage from Banishing Smite, 4d8 radiant damage from Divine Smite, 5d6 acid damage from Absorb Elements, and 3d8 thunder damage from Booming Blade.
Let’s total this up: 6d8+1d4+3d6 thunder + 2d8 cold + 6d8+5d10 force + 4d8 radiant + 5d6 acid damage
All these dice are doubled on the critical hit from Assassinate: 12d8+2d4+6d6 thunder + 4d8 cold + 12d8+10d10 force + 8d8 radiant + 10d6 acid damage
Now, counting the flat damage: 10 thunder damage from Saitama’s STR modifier on the Thunder Gauntlets, +1 thunder damage from the Enhanced Weapon infusion, +6 thunder damage from Hexblade’s Curse, and +2 thunder damage from the Dueling fighting style, for a total of +19 thunder damage. We also add 20 radiant damage from the Radiant Soul transformation.
Another preliminary total: 12d8+2d4+6d6+19 thunder + 4d8 cold + 12d8+10d10 force + 8d8+20 radiant + 10d6 acid damage
All the damage is doubled by the vulnerability inflicted by Path to the Grave: 24d8+4d4+12d6+38 thunder + 8d8 cold + 24d8+20d10 force + 16d8+40 radiant + 20d6 acid damage
This averages to 198 thunder + 36 cold + 218 force + 112 radiant + 70 acid damage, for a total of 634 damage on average in a single punch.
Anything that survives this formidable blow must then have more than 50 hit points remaining, or else it is banished to its home plane without a save by Banishing Smite (thus, Saitama's punch can effectively defeat creatures with up to 684 HP).
After two short rests, Saitama could theoretically do a Serious Punch again on the same day — minus the +40 radiant damage from Radiant Soul (doubled by Path to the Grave), the only ability used that requires a long rest to recharge. After a second Serious Punch, though, he’ll run out of third-level spell slots for the Divine Smite.

The targets (who survives?)

With the most hit points out of any monster in DND 5e, the Tarrasque has 676 HP, damage immunities to fire, poison, and bludgeoning/piercing/slashing damage from nonmagical attacks, three legendary resistances per day, advantage on saves against spells, can nullify or reflect ranged attack spells, and can terrify creatures within 120 feet with its Frightful Presence.None of this protects it from a single punch from our Caped Baldy. On 62% of possible damage rolls, that Tarrasque is getting sent back to its plane of origin, gibbering with fear: with a WIS modifier of +0, it has no chance of succeeding the DC 24 WIS save against Saitama’s Menacing Attack (of course, Tarrasques are immune to the frightened condition, but let’s ignore that because it’s funny).
However, this doesn’t quite count as killing the tarrasque in a single punch, since it’s banished but still alive (and returns after one minute if it’s not originally from another plane). Additionally, a several other monsters could definitely survive the punch — chief among them, Tiamat:Outside of being immune to acid and cold damage (reducing the damage by 106 points and dropping the remaining 528 total damage from the punch well below her total HP of 615), Tiamat is also immune to spells of level 6 or lower: thus completely nullifying the effects of both Booming Blade and Banishing Smite. However, as a fiend, Divine Smite does deal an extra d8 radiant damage against her. Still, eliminating Booming Blade and Banishing Smite drops the single punch damage to 382 on average, leaving Tiamat with 233 HP: more than a third of her health.Instead casting Banishing Smite and Booming Blade, Saitama could use his action to punch twice using the Thirsting Blade eldritch invocation, spending both his 5th-level Pact Magic spell slots on Eldritch Smites and both 3rd-level slots on Divine Smites. If Saitama managed to sneak up on Tiamat to surprise her and get the automatic critical hits from Assassinate, he would deal 3d8+1d4+3d6 thunder + 6d8 force + 5d8 radiant damage on each attack, doubled from the critical hit to 6d8+2d4+6d6 thunder + 12d8 force + 10d8 radiant damage, and a total of +19 thunder on both attacks and +20 radiant on the first. The first attack damage would be doubled from Path to the Grave, but the second would not. The first attack would deal 12d8+4d4+12d6+38 thunder + 24d8 force + 20d8+40 radiant damage, and the second 6d8+2d4+6d6+19 thunder + 12d8 force + 10d8 radiant; for a total damage of 553 on average, still 62 points short of Tiamat’s 615 total HP.
Other creatures that would survive:

• Sapphire Greatwyrms and Velomachus Lorehold — with immunities to thunder damage and HP totals of 507 and 487 respectively, they survive the 436 total non-thunder damage from Saitama’s Serious Punch. With 51 HP remaining on average, Velomachus also has a 53% chance of having enough HP to escape getting banished.
• Amethyst Greatwyrms and Tanazir Quandrix — with immunities to force damage and HP totals of 507 and 444 respectively, they survive the 416 total non-force damage from the Serious Punch. Tanazir is almost definitely getting banished, though.
• The Aspect of Tiamat and Aspect of Bahamut are immune to both fire and cold damage, reducing the Serious Punch to 528 damage — not enough to eliminate their 574 and 585 hit points, respectively. However, both Aspects might still fall victim to the Banishing Smite: 56% of damage rolls will deal enough damage to banish the Aspect of Tiamat, and 37% of rolls for the Aspect of Bahamut. Interestingly, banishing these monsters with the Banishing Smite might be better than reducing them to 0 HP, because dropping them to 0 would trigger their Chromatic Wrath / Platinum Brilliance traits, resetting their HP to 500, recharging their breath weapons and legendary resistances, and unlocking their Mythic Actions.
• Copper Greatwyrms are immune to acid damage, reducing the Serious Punch to 564 damage on average — allowing them to barely survive with 1 hit point left (out of their HP total of 565). They will survive on 52% of damage rolls, and almost certainly get banished if they do. However, on the 48% of damage rolls that succeed in reducing them to 0 HP, they will actually not get banished: instead, their Metallic Awakening will immediately trigger and will reset their HP to 450.
• Silver Greatwyrms have 565 HP and immunity to cold damage, but even without cold damage, the Serious Punch still deals 598 damage on average: enough to reduce them to 0 HP on 91% of damage rolls. Interestingly, this gives Silver Greatwyrms higher odds of surviving than Copper Greatwyrms, because they are far more likely to trigger the Metallic Awakening and reset their HP to 450 to escape banishment — rather than Copper Greatwyrms, which have better-than-even odds of surviving the initial punch but then getting banished for their trouble.
• The other 11 types of Greatwyrm not yet mentioned will also survive thanks the same reason as the Silver Greatwyrm: they can't survive the initial punch, but being reduced to 0 HP will trigger their Metallic/Chromatic/Gem Awakening traits to reset their HP to 400 or more, ironically allowing them to evade being banished. Of the 15 types of Greatwyrm, only Copper Greatwyrms have moderate odds of getting banished in a single strike — the others will either survive the first hit entirely, or get reduced to 0 hit points and trigger their Awakening to avoid getting banished.
• Zariel from Mordenkainen’s Tome of Foes and Archduke Zariel of Avernus from Descent into Avernus each have resistance to radiant damage, resistance or immunity to cold damage (respectively), and 580 hit points. However, they are fiends, causing the Divine Smite to add an additional 9 radiant damage on average (the 1d8 extra Divine Smite damage to fiends is doubled twice from the critical hit and Path to the Grave, but halved from Zariel’s resistance to radiant damage). Accounting for the resistance to radiant damage and the bonus Divine Smite damage to fiends, the punch deals 587 total damage. Then, subtracting 18 damage for cold resistance or 36 damage for cold immunity, Zariel survives with 11 HP and Archduke Zariel with 29 HP — both still very likely getting banished back to Avernus.
• No creature has resistance to thunder and more than 535 hit points to survive the punch, resistance to force damage and more than 525 hit points, or resistance to acid damage and more than 599 hit points. Only 10 creatures other than Zariel have resistances to thunder, cold, force, radiant, or acid damage and more than 400 HP: of those, Sul Khatesh, Rak Tulkhesh, Orcus, and the Demogorgon’s cold resistances reduce the damage by 18, but, as fiends, they take an additional 18 radiant damage from Divine Smite — and with 475, 478, 405, and 406/464 HP respectively (depending on the source book), they get easily annihilated by the Serious Punch. Tromokratis is resistant to both thunder and cold damage, reducing the Serious Punch by 117 damage, but with 409 HP, the Serious Punch still deals over 100 more points of damage than necessary to kill it. The Marut and the Ancient Amethyst Dragon are also only resistant to one of the damage types, which does not reduce the damage enough for them to survive.
• Many creatures have the Regeneration trait that allow them to survive and regain a certain amount of HP at the start of their turn even if they start their turn with 0 HP. However, taking radiant damage disables this trait for fiends, undead, and aberrations, and acid damage disables it for trolls and giants. Cold damage disables it for Tlexolotl and Vegepygmy, thunder damage for the Glasswork Golem, and spell damage for Wereravens. Four monsters have Regeneration traits that still work to bring them back from 0 HP after being hit by Saitama's punch: Loup Garou regenerate if not dealt damage with a silver weapon; the Jabberwock regenerates if not dealt slashing damage; and the Regenerating Black Pudding and Living Doll regenerate if not dealt fire damage (for the Wood Woad, banishment likely counts as no longer being “in contact with the ground” and therefore its Regeneration trait fails). None of these monsters have more than 300 HP, so the 634 damage from Saitama's Punch may be enough to destroy them by dealing more than double their max HP in a single instance of damage — however, Jeremy Crawford rules that massive damage is not enough to kill a monster with regeneration (https://youtu.be/1frsmP_AzV0?t=2663).
• Some undead have an Undead Fortitude trait that allows them to drop to 1 HP instead of 0 on a save; however, these traits are disabled by both the fact that the Serious Punch deals radiant damage, is a critical hit (from Assassinate), and that they would have to succeed on a CON save with a DC of 5+the damage taken: DC 657 (when taking account the extra 18 radiant damage Divine Smite deals to undead).
• Vampires, Liches, and other monsters with the Rejuvenation trait may also be utterly destroyed by the punch, but survive by regenerating or gaining a new body later. However, we will still count them as having been killed by the punch, even if they didn’t fully die. Even if they return to bother Saitama, he can just destroy them again in a single punch.
• There may be other monsters with features that allow them to escape a single attack — if there are, they don't immediately come to mind.
• Edit (thanks to u/ItsOmar9000 ): Of course, I'm forgetting another monster that would easily survive Saitama's punch: the almighty Nilbog. Sporting zero damage resistances or immunities and a whopping 7 hit points, this beast of a CR 1 monster laughs in the face of Saitama's punch, capable of dealing over 90 times its hit point total. As Saitama swings with murderous intent and the fist connects, unimaginable damage rippling through the Nilbog's small goblinoid frame, a comical Reversal of Fortune occurs: Saitama's fist stutters to a standstill, dealing 0 damage, and the Nilbog regains 1d6 hit points. Truly, the Nilbog is the only monster worthy of standing beside Tiamat as the two monsters that can nullify Saitama's serious punch.

Thus, our final list of 27 28 survivors of Saitama’s punch:

• Nullifies the punch (1): Tiamat, Nilbog
• Avoids banishment with 51-100 HP (3): Sapphire Greatwyrm, Amethyst Greatwyrm, Aspect of Bahamut
• Gets reduced to 0 but avoids banishment by resetting their HP through the Awakening trait (12): Silver Greatwyrm and 11 other types of Greatwyrm
• 50/50 odds of being banished (3): Velomachus Lorehold, Aspect of Tiamat, Copper Greatwyrm
• Likely banished, but still alive (4): Tarrasque, Tanazir Quandrix, Zariel and Archduke Zariel
• Reduced to 0 HP and banished, but regenerates (4): Loup Garou, Jabberwock, Regenerating Black Pudding, Living Doll

Saitama can kill all remaining 2,800+ monsters ever printed in a single punch.

Thank you for reading!

If you've gotten this far, thanks for sticking with me! If you have any ideas on how to squeeze out the last bits of damage to allow Saitama to one-hit kill any of the remaining 27 monsters, please comment to let me know!

I admire your luck, Mr...?
Bond. James Bond.

Special Agent 007, James Bond is the star agent of MI6. Always cool under pressure and licensed to kill, James is sent to infiltrate enemy organizations and destroy them from the inside. Over the decades, James Bond has gone from serious to campy and back again, but always manages to get the job done through wit, physical ability and superior equipment.
Bond generally wields a sidearm with lethal efficiency, along with a number of incredible gadgets developed by the geniuses at Q Branch. With his remarkable physical ability and ever-changing bag of tools, there isn't an international crime organization that Bond has failed to take down. The only thing that could possible distract Bond are his own vices: women or booze, both of which have gotten one over on him in the past.
James Bond Respect Threads by Actor
Sean Connery- 1962 to 1967, once more in 1971. Physically strong, numerous gadgets disguised as everyday items. Adept in traditional spy skills, like infiltration and observation.
George Lazenby- Once in 1969. Very similar to Connery in his craftiness, skilled specifically in winter sports.
Roger Moore- 1973 to 1985. Downright campy, making use of almost cartoonish skills that actually work in-universe. Skilled driver and pilot with a variety of gadgets.
Timothy Dalton- 1987 to 1989. Colder and more quick to become violent than the others. Usually carries a firearm and a lethal gadget to kill enemies.
Pierce Brosnan- 1995 to 2002. Best variety of gadgets of any Bond. Great feats of endurance and athletic ability.
Daniel Craig- 2006 to 2021. The most realistic Bond, yet has some of the most impressive physical abilities in any of the movies. Low variety of gadgets, but excels in gunfights.
Hover over a feat to see the film it’s from. Additionally, the name of any gif on Gfycat contains the last name of the actor that accomplished it.

Physicals

You have a nasty habit of surviving.
Well, you know what they say about the fittest.

Strength
Striking

• Breaks a wooden board with a downward strike
• Tackles a man through two bathroom stalls
• Barrels through a temporary construction wall
• Punches through drywall and wood to access a hidden room

Lifting/Throwing

• Picks up and throws a chair at a man, knocking him out
• Fights off an attacker with a couch
• Picks up and slides a man across a table
• Tosses a chain onto a low-flying helicopter to cause it to crash
• Holds a man above a ledge by the hair

Grip

• When he’s held underwater by two women, Bond surfaces and holds both of them underwater with one hand each
• Holds onto a small plane while the pilot tries to shake him off
• Catches a rope on a blimp and holds on even after it rises high into the air
• Holds onto the top of a speeding car, even when the driver attempts to shake him off
• Avoids falling out of a plane’s airlock by grabbing onto some netting
• Holds onto the outside of a moving seaplane, even after the pilot attempts to shake him off
• Holds onto the bottom of an elevator car as it rises up a skyscraper

Pushing

• With one other guy, Bond rolls this large concrete column
• Knocks over a large bookshelf

Other

• After being buried in snow by an avalanche, Bond climbs out and is relatively okay about a minute later
• Wrestles with a large constricting snake before killing it with a poison injector

Endurance
Blunt Force

• Keeps fighting after getting a wooden chair broken over his back
• Stays conscious after strikes from Oddjob
  • Oddjob RT
• Fights on through hits with a fireplace poker
• Jumps from a bridge to a passing boat, falling through the roof and onto a wedding cake
• While hanging onto a blimp, he’s smacked into the Golden Gate Bridge and quickly starts climbing up
• He’s knocked down a ladder, but recovers by the time he gets to the bottom rung
• Continues fighting Stamper after a number of blows to the face
• Falls from a low hot air balloon onto a domed structure, and he recovers by grabbing some nearby cables
  • Bond suffered a dislocated collarbone after this fall, however
• When jumping off a low crane, Bond stumbles, falling into a metal air vent. He’s up and running moments later.
• Recieves cock and ball torture by Le Chiffre’s rope, at first barely responding, then laughing in his torturer’s face
• Falls one or two stories onto the top of a bus, but gets up quickly
• Fights on after being hit across the back with a metal pipe four times
• Keeps fighting through repeated strikes from Hinx, like getting thrown into walls or getting thrown through thin walls
  • Mr. Hinx Respect Thread found here
• [Limit] Has a recurring weakness to blunt force trauma to the back of the head

Piercing/Cutting

• Keeps running despite being shot in the calf
  • He’s later seen patching up his calf in the bathroom, so he was definitely hit by a bullet
• Keeps fighting after being cut across the chest and being shot up by a nail gun
• Gets shot in the shoulder by a handgun, but operates mostly unimpeded

Other

• Resists being garroted long enough to grab a knife, stabbing his attacker and turning the garrote wire back on him
• Takes over 12 Gs of force before destroying the machine with an armor-piercing dart
  • Real-life astronauts are typically trained to withstand up to 9 Gs of force.
• Gets electrocuted with a gauntlet that can output 100,000 volts, which leaves him writhing in pain but conscious
  • Scene describing the electrical weapon, where the 100,000 volt figure is from
• Bond is shot by a sniper rifle and falls off a high bridge into water. After three months, Bond is mostly physically able again, although his aim is more noticeably affected.
• Endures having a small surgical drill bore into the back of his skull and into the part of the brain that deals with recognition, seemingly to no negative neurological effect

Agility
Movement

• Chases down an assassin, tackling him
• Takes a running jump up to a rising platform
• Catches up to an aircraft taking off on the runway
• Runs and jumps into a closing metal door
• Catches up to an airplane during takeoff, jumping into the plane through the landing gear
• Catches up to a fleeing truck on a runway, although it obviously hasn’t accelerated to full speed
• Escapes a CIA squad with just a moment's warning
• Runs away from a fireball caused by a house-sized explosion

Reflexes

• While on the ground, he dodges katana swings
• Dodges a thrown knife, then pulls it out of the wood behind him to kill the assassin
• Dodges a dune buggy at close range
• Evades shotgun fire from a pursuer
• Evades rifle fire, then shoots the enemy gunman
• Evades handgun fire with a roll, then avoids some distant machine gun fire
• Dodges a harpoon underwater
• When a man attempts to shoot Bond’s knees from nearly point blank range, Bond moves his legs to avoid the shots
• Uses an enemy to block gunfire
• While sitting in the passenger seat, Bond grabs the driver’s arm before they can shoot him
• Rolls away from an incendiary grenade’s detonation moments after noticing it

Combat Skill

Problem solver?
More of a problem eliminator.

Unarmed Combat
Quick Knock Outs

• Judo flips an attacker, then punches him
• Dispatches a guard with a neck strike
• Silently KOs a man, then steals his equipment to blend in with a scuba crew
• KOs a guard with a judo chop
• Stealthily KOs a guard from behind cover
• Knocks a man out with one kick to the head
• Ends an attempted fistfight with an elbow and then slamming the man on a table
• Knocks out a man by slamming him into the walls of an elevator twice
• Punches a guy out in two strikes
• Consistently one-punches goons
• From a sprint, Bond jumps and kicks a man in the face to knock him out

Against Individuals

• Breaks a hold from behind by a man who wrestles alligators
• Fights evenly with Grant in a train car, with both men getting in hits before Grant begins garroting Bond with a concealed wire
  • Grant is a trained Russian assassin who no-sells strikes to the stomach with brass knuckles
• Sweeps Pussy Galore to the floor, then reverses her judo throw attempt
• Wrestles with Hans before flipping him into a piranha pond
• Flips a man with judo throws twice
• Defeats a strong, tough guy in the hotel
• Has an awesome fistfight with a heavyset henchman, ending with Bond punching him off a rooftop
• Fights an assassin while dangling outside of a moving plane
• Has an extended fistfight with Alec Trevylyn, former agent 006, ending with Alec grabbing a handgun to hold Bond at gunpoint
• During a fight, he breaks a man’s arm, then punches him off a ledge
• Brawls with a martial artist on the outside of a crane

Against Multiple Attackers

• Knocks out six men when fleeing on a rooftop
• Starts thrashing technicians until one pulls a gun
• Defeats four guards in hand-to-hand combat
• Knocks out two attackers who ambushed him
• Drops about four men in a bar fight
• While handcuffed, Bond knocks out four surrounding MI6 agents in an elevator
• Drops two guards with one strike each

Against Armed Attackers

• Kicks away a gunman's gun, then beats him up in the ocean
• Disarms an armed woman with one hand
• While unarmed, Bond fights with a knife-wielding villain, with Bond disarming him and tackling him into water
• Disarms a woman and puts her in a painful armhold
• Disarms a gunman and knocks him down some stairs
• Has an extended fight with a man with a machete while in a confined space. Bond himself was unarmed, although he did ball up his jacket to block some strikes.
• Takes out a CIA riot officer with an elbow to the face
• While completely unarmed, defeats a man wielding an axe, even tricking him into slicing his own foot
• Brawls with an assassin armed with a sniper rifle before dropping him out of a skyscraper
• Intentionally breaks the ice on a frozen lake to bring a gunman down into the water, then Bond chokes him to death with his leg

With Weapons
Blades

• Kills a man with his own knife in one maneuver
• In just a few moves, Bond defeats a henchman in a machete fight, throwing him into a container full of snakes
• Steals a man’s knife, then pins his tie to a nearby counter
• Swordfights with a trained fencer, eventually switching to broadswords, where Bond draws first blood from the torso
• While being held at knifepoint, Bond turns and kills the man with his own knife after a struggle

Blunt Objects

• Breaks a man’s neck with a fireplace poker
• Disarms a diver, then uses the harpoon gun to shatter their goggles
• Using an oar, Bond fights off a man with a large hook
• Uses a ski to knock a man off of a cliff, then kills another man after a struggle
• While unarmed, Bond is attacked by an assassin with a knife, but manages to kill the assassin with a pair of scissors
• Spots an attacker in the reflection of a bronze decoration, then uses the decoration to bludgeon them
• Fights off four men who were beating him with a bat moments before, making heavy use of furniture and blunt items

Unorthodox Items

• Defeats three men in the confined space of a cockpit
• Throws flammable alcohol onto an assassin, igniting him
• Beats down a guard with a door, then five strikes
• Takes out two motorcycle-riding assassins with a long plank of wood
• Uses a ski pole to set a trap for a motorbike-riding assassin
• Knocks out a prison guard while handcuffed, at one point using the cuffs on the man's face
• Defeats two men in a crumbling building, using exposed wiring and a nail gun to dispatch them

Environment Focused

• Brawls with an assassin in a hotel room before throwing him into a bathtub and knocking a fan into the water, electrocuting him
• Kills Oddjob by using exposed electrical wiring on a metal cage that Oddjob was touching
• Tricks Jaws into hitting a wood column, knocking a wooden structure over himself
• Brawls with Jaws atop a cable car
• Fights off three hockey player assassins in a hockey rink, taking one out with the zamboni
• Judo throws a goon onto a bed of spikes
• While pinned to a wooden door by knives, he opens the door and kills an assassin with one of the knives
• Smacks a henchman with a plane’s antenna, throwing him off the plane
• Tosses maggots at a gunman, then knocks him out and judo throws him into the maggots
• Bond drags a guard into water and drowns him
• Bond ties a rope around Mr. Hinx’s neck and attaches it to a weight, then kicks that weight off the train to pull Hinx away

Accuracy

You wouldn’t kill me. You’d miss me.
I never miss.

Pistols

• Grabs Goldfinger’s gun and fires on an airplane window, sucking the villain out of the plane
• Shoots a gunman despite their being behind a column for cover
• Right after waking up, he shoots a ninja in the dark
• Poses as a wax figure and shoots Scaramanga
• Shoots three soldiers with his Walther P5, two of them being headshots
• Accurately hits a gunman from a moving speedboat
• Shoots a gunman through a wooden floor
• Uses a human shield to block bullets, then returns fire, killing a gunman
• Turns and fires on a man before he can fire
• Shoots a man while hanging upside-down by the leg
• Disarms and shoots two policemen
• Disarms the man holding him at gunpoint, then kills four other armed men in seconds
• Shoots two fire extinguishers to obscure the room and allow hostages to safely escape
• While handcuffed and at gunpoint, Bond steals the gun to shoot his captors

Against Vehicles

• Uses the Walther PPK to shoot out a dune buggy’s front tire
• Fires a Taurus PT92 into the engine of an oncoming Jeep, disabling it
• From a speedboat, Bond accurately hits a helicopter’s engine enough with a handgun to cause it to crash

Rifles/Submachine Guns

• Using a sniper rifle, Bond shoots a man in a helicopter, causing him to drop his grenade inside
• Fires a rifle, killing three goons, while sliding down a bannister
• Kills at least 8 men with a submachine gun in a short timeframe
• Turns around and shoots a gunman before he can kill his hostage. Note that Bond turns and fires right after the gunman receives orders to kill the hostage.
• Spots a sneaking soldier dressed in black and kills him with a rifle
• Fires on a guard before the guard can fire his weapon
• From a speeding hovercraft, Bond hits small land mines to detonate them on his pursuers
• Uses a Sa vz. 58 Compact to escape Blofeld’s facility, killing nearly a dozen guards, even at extreme range

Other Firearms

• Turns and immediately shoots a harpoon gun, killing a stealthy assassin
• Takes out a distant sniper by firing a shotgun
• Accurately shoots a sniper’s rifle with his own, rather than kill her
• Escapes a crowd of divers by stealing a harpoon gun and firing it into a nearby seaplane, pulling himself away

Non-Firearm Accuracy

• Throws three scalpels into a man’s arm and chest
• Throws a knife into a specific date on a calendar from across a room
• When the auto-targeting system fails, Bond manually shoots down a capsule full of viruses with a laser cannon
• Kills a man with a climbing spike

Other Skills

I always enjoyed learning a new tongue.
You always were a cunning linguist, James.

Athletics

• Dives off an oil rig into the ocean below
• Avoids machine gun fire while skiing
• Continues skiing after losing a ski
• While skiing, Bond jumps and twists to smack two gunmen with his skis
• Goes rock climbing on a nearly vertical rock wall
• Temporarily outswims the pull of an industrial fan before destroying it with his air tank
• Performs a HALO jump into water, then immediately begins scuba diving
• Swims outside of a submarine, scaling the surface until he can re-enter the vessel on the other side. He had to hold his breath for almost two minutes while scaling the outside of the submarine.
• Infiltrates North Korea by simply surfing onto the coast of the country
• Parasurfs off a collapsing iceberg
• Leaps from a crashing plane, catching up to his partner and using her parachute to save them both

Driving/Piloting
Driving

• Weaves around a parking lot, causing a dozen cop cars to crash into themselves, walls or parked cars
• Briefly drives on two wheels to slip through a narrow alley
• Drifts a double decker bus, causing a couple cops to crash their motorcycles
• Jumps over a river in a car using a broken bridge as a ramp
• While driving, he knocks over barrels onto enemies, then drives on two wheels to block bullets
• Drives a car over a ramp, onto a bus, then back to ground level

Piloting Aircraft

• Picks up a villain's wheelchair with a helicopter, then drops him into a smokestack
• Avoids a heat-seeking missile while piloting a small plane, redirecting it into an enemy hangar
• Dodges a stinger missile by driving a semi-truck on only the left hand wheels
• Starts a helicopter in midair and lands safely
• While flying a much less maneuverable plane, Bond tricks a fighter jet into crashing into a mountainside by producing smoke from a damaged engine
• Ejects a pilot from a helicopter, then pulls the helicopter out of freefall

Other

• Jumps a speedboat over a small patch of land
• Drifts a tank, then drives through a building to cause untold property damage

Traversal

• Performs a front flip off a ledge
• Traverses a ski lift wire with nothing more than a pair of mittens
• Traverses the underside of an oil rig by swinging on a rope, then walking a tightrope
• Jumps on the back of a couple alligators to escape a swamp
• Swings on vines like Tarzan to escape pursuers
• Traverses the side of a moving train
• Uses a long pole to safely travel down a building, then releases the pole to smack a pursuing officer
• Performs a combat roll down stairs to avoid handgun fire
• Runs up a crane to reach the top of a building under construction
• Climbs up a vertical I-beam
• From the top of a moving truck, Bond runs and flips through the open windshield
• Jumps down a story onto stone, rolling to avoid impact damage

Stealth

• Uses a hollow reed to hide underwater from guards and dogs
• Hides in plain sight by pretending to be making out, but it’s actually just his own arms wrapped around himself
• Evades a crowd of police
• Lowers his heart rate to trick medical staff and an EKG, then dispatches the staff and escapes the hospital
• Broke into M’s house to use her computer

Other

• [Observation] Notices an attacker in the reflection of a woman’s eye, then uses her as a human shield to block a strike
• [Foreign Language] Learned several Asian languages at Cambridge
• [Alcoholism] Can tell the temperature of alcohol after one sip
• [Deception] Poses as a genealogist under the pseudonym Sir Hillary Bray. After a few days, Blofeld sees through the ruse and has Bond captured.
• [Underwater] Ties a boat to a large rock with the rope he’s bound in, causing the boat to break the rope, freeing Bond
• [Sleight of Hand] Switches out a priceless Faberge egg for a fake copy
• [Animal Commanding] Commands a wild tiger to sit, and it actually listens
• [Gambling] Wins a quarter of a million dollars at a high stakes gambling table
• [Invention] Descends a tall building with some rope and an unconscious body
• [Seduction] Seduces a married woman to learn more about her husband’s criminal activity
• [Preparation] Puts shotgun shells under the floorboards in order to fire on intruders when they step on them
• [Observation] Identifies a hidden door based on a tiny sliver of light through the crack

Equipment

Right, now pay attention 007. I want you to take great care of this equipment. There are one or two rather special accessories.
Q, have I ever let you down?
Frequently.

Weapons
Firearms

• Carries a Walther PPK, a discreet pistol with excellent stopping power
• A collapsible Armalite AR-7 sniper rifle with an infrared sight, allowing for use in the dark
• Bond carries a S&W model 29 revolver in early Moore films, then later switches to his iconic Walther PPK, then, finally, uses the Walther P5
• Carries a very small firearm, the Beretta 950 Jetfire
• Has a firearm disguised as a camera. Additionally, the device is programmed to Bond’s own palm signature, meaning only he can fire the weapon.
  • The camera gun can be outfitted with a scope and tripod for long range fire
• A suppressed UMP-9, used to fire on Mr. White’s leg at range
• A Walther PPK with a palm-print sensor coded to Bond’s hand, meaning only he can fire it
  • Sure enough, when someone else tries to use it, it just doesn’t fire
• A heavily modified Glock 17, with laser sight and microphone attachment

Other

• A combat knife
• A projectile launcher disguised as a cigarette, gifted to Bond by a ninja master
• A grenade disguised as a ballpoint pen
  • By tossing the grenade pen into a pool of fuel, an explosion and destructive fire is formed
• A grenade disguised as a lighter
• A flashbang explosive disguised as a handgun, used to stun three gunmen, allowing Bond to dispatch them

Gadgets
Mobility

• A grappling gun and cord that attaches to his pants, allowing him to scale the outside of a skyscraper
  • Can be outfitted with metal projectiles and used as a firearm instead
• Briefly wore a ninja outfit with suction cups on the palms and knees, used to scale down metal walls
• Flies away from a fight with a jetpack
• A belt with a hidden high-tensile cord, enough to support Bond’s own weight
  • Using the belt cord, Bond swings Spider-Man-style across a room and out a window

Reconnaissance/Infiltration

• A small explosive, used to blow a lock off a cell door
• Has a small safe-cracking device disguised as a cigarette case
• Special glasses to see through tinted glass
• Photocopier disguised as a checkbook
• A digital skeleton key disguised as a gift card
• Binoculars built into a pair of glasses
• Sunglasses with built in X-ray vision, allowing Bond to detect concealed weapons and see through women’s clothing
• A powerful camera, used to identify the faces of high profile criminals with just a few pixels
• A cell phone that acts as a fingerprint scanner, a powerful taser and as a remote control for a BMW

Continued in Comments