Quiktrip near me now
Mostly vintage photographs from around South Afrca
2012.02.22 23:44 TheWox Mostly vintage photographs from around South Afrca
2022.10.20 02:54 okbuddyblackadam
okbuddyblackadam is for the biggest blackadam fans ever (me) to talk about dwayne the rock johnson in his new hit movie 2022 black adam out now in cinema near you i love black adam
2008.08.26 21:22 Independent Baseball
Your center for Independent Baseball throughout the United States of America and Canada.
2023.06.06 19:00 caksters Mum diagnosed with reoccurring cancer, how to deal with idea that she will most likely die soon?
My mum (77) was diagnosed 6 years ago with ovarian cancer. she went through chemo and surgery that got he through cancer and everything was looking good until last year.
Last year she was diagnosed with stage 2 pancreatic cancer. she had surgery where part of her pancreas has been removed. Standard of living has decreased significantly. She finished chemo and had 3 months recovery period.
Now some biomarkers are indicating that something is off with intestines and that there might be cancer lingering there.
I am living abroad and the only way I support her is by speaking with her 1-2 times a day. I try to go home few times a year but it is difficult with my family and work.
Hearing the latest news I am automatically assuming the worst case scenario. My mind can’t fully comprehend this. I am not feeling sad/angry/anxious about it, but I know that if doctor says that outlook is not looking good then panic will set in.
For a while I knew that I need to realise that my parents will pass away sooner or later. And I need to make the most out of the time they have left in this world by supporting them and being a loving child that loves and support them.
But I don’t know how to deal with my emotions where I logically fully understand what is most likely going to happen and my internal confused feelings about this.
I would appreciate any support that would help me navigate this.
submitted by caksters to CancerFamilySupport [link] [comments]
Last year she was diagnosed with stage 2 pancreatic cancer. she had surgery where part of her pancreas has been removed. Standard of living has decreased significantly. She finished chemo and had 3 months recovery period.
Now some biomarkers are indicating that something is off with intestines and that there might be cancer lingering there.
I am living abroad and the only way I support her is by speaking with her 1-2 times a day. I try to go home few times a year but it is difficult with my family and work.
Hearing the latest news I am automatically assuming the worst case scenario. My mind can’t fully comprehend this. I am not feeling sad/angry/anxious about it, but I know that if doctor says that outlook is not looking good then panic will set in.
For a while I knew that I need to realise that my parents will pass away sooner or later. And I need to make the most out of the time they have left in this world by supporting them and being a loving child that loves and support them.
But I don’t know how to deal with my emotions where I logically fully understand what is most likely going to happen and my internal confused feelings about this.
I would appreciate any support that would help me navigate this.
2023.06.06 19:00 caksters Mum diagnosed with reoccurring cancer, how to deal with idea that she will most likely die soon?
My mum (77) was diagnosed 6 years ago with ovarian cancer. she went through chemo and surgery that got he through cancer and everything was looking good until last year.
Last year she was diagnosed with stage 2 pancreatic cancer. she had surgery where part of her pancreas has been removed. Standard of living has decreased significantly. She finished chemo and had 3 months recovery period.
Now some biomarkers are indicating that something is off with intestines and that there might be cancer lingering there.
I am living abroad and the only way I support her is by speaking with her 1-2 times a day. I try to go home few times a year but it is difficult with my family and work.
Hearing the latest news I am automatically assuming the worst case scenario. My mind can’t fully comprehend this. I am not feeling sad/angry/anxious about it, but I know that if doctor says that outlook is not looking good then panic will set in.
For a while I knew that I need to realise that my parents will pass away sooner or later. And I need to make the most out of the time they have left in this world by supporting them and being a loving child that loves and support them.
But I don’t know how to deal with my emotions where I logically fully understand what is most likely going to happen and my internal confused feelings about this.
I would appreciate any support that would help me navigate this.
submitted by caksters to CancerFamilySupport [link] [comments]
Last year she was diagnosed with stage 2 pancreatic cancer. she had surgery where part of her pancreas has been removed. Standard of living has decreased significantly. She finished chemo and had 3 months recovery period.
Now some biomarkers are indicating that something is off with intestines and that there might be cancer lingering there.
I am living abroad and the only way I support her is by speaking with her 1-2 times a day. I try to go home few times a year but it is difficult with my family and work.
Hearing the latest news I am automatically assuming the worst case scenario. My mind can’t fully comprehend this. I am not feeling sad/angry/anxious about it, but I know that if doctor says that outlook is not looking good then panic will set in.
For a while I knew that I need to realise that my parents will pass away sooner or later. And I need to make the most out of the time they have left in this world by supporting them and being a loving child that loves and support them.
But I don’t know how to deal with my emotions where I logically fully understand what is most likely going to happen and my internal confused feelings about this.
I would appreciate any support that would help me navigate this.
2023.06.06 19:00 classygingerboi Where from here???
Me (m18) and my girlfriend (18) have been seeing each other for about two months now. However she just recently found out that I was flirting with another girl while we were still in the talking phase. Once things were official (about two weeks in )I cut off all communication with this “other girl” and haven’t spoken to her since. She says she forgives me and all but our dynamic has been so off for the past two days… I just want things to feel normal. Thoughts?
submitted by classygingerboi to teenagers [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 19:00 crazymomooo Got out a toxic attachment
I had a guy friend whom I considered my best friend at one point and had no feelings for him what so ever. He tried to pull me in to at least a situationship/fwb. I resisted every single move but didn’t end our friendship as I didn’t want to lose what we had.
He was very unstable financially and took some random loans from apps which he couldn’t pay back. He would pester me for money so that he can pay at least for interest of those. When I refused to give him money as I didn’t have much at that point, he constantly asked me to ask my parents for money by coming up with some or the other lie. I was not okay with it and didn’t respond to his messages as he was being unrealistic. He then asked my friend to send a pic of what I was doing on snapchat and the snap had me playing a game on my mobile. All hell broke loose!! He sent me the screenshot of my pic and called me a bitch for not responding to him when he’s in trouble. Later, he came up with some random apology and being an idiot I am, I forgave him.
But he didn’t change and there are times we go out or I spend on my online shopping, he constantly shamed me to no end by calling me names and saying that I’m a spoilt brat who spends money recklessly. Mind you, it was my fucking money. I earned those. He still thought he had a say in that. I once got a refund on my cancelled flight ticket and he asked me to him that refund money as I have already spent it, so I would be okay with no having it.
And he never had money on him. EVER. Whenever we go out, I had to pay. Every single time. From a street food to fancy meal.
He subtly used to ask for stuff as ‘gifts’ and slyly asked me once to order something on amazon. He wanted the same thing which I ordered. The order he shamed me for wasting money. When I asked him mode of payment and whether he’s okay with CoD, he had the fucking balls to say that I should pay for it otherwise he doesn’t want it.
He tried to control every single aspect of my life. From my friends to the relationship I have with my family members. He doesn’t like me talking to other guys as he ‘knows’ their intentions. He purposefully ruined my chances with my crush! On top of that he stole my personal pics from my phone when he took my phone on pretext of an emergency.
I have had it enough now !! I gathered strength to come out of this toxic mess I got myself into. I broke off this stupid ‘friendship’. I sense a weird and refreshing relief now, of not having someone on my head 24x7 trying to play me like a video game.
submitted by crazymomooo to TwoXChromosomes [link] [comments]
He was very unstable financially and took some random loans from apps which he couldn’t pay back. He would pester me for money so that he can pay at least for interest of those. When I refused to give him money as I didn’t have much at that point, he constantly asked me to ask my parents for money by coming up with some or the other lie. I was not okay with it and didn’t respond to his messages as he was being unrealistic. He then asked my friend to send a pic of what I was doing on snapchat and the snap had me playing a game on my mobile. All hell broke loose!! He sent me the screenshot of my pic and called me a bitch for not responding to him when he’s in trouble. Later, he came up with some random apology and being an idiot I am, I forgave him.
But he didn’t change and there are times we go out or I spend on my online shopping, he constantly shamed me to no end by calling me names and saying that I’m a spoilt brat who spends money recklessly. Mind you, it was my fucking money. I earned those. He still thought he had a say in that. I once got a refund on my cancelled flight ticket and he asked me to him that refund money as I have already spent it, so I would be okay with no having it.
And he never had money on him. EVER. Whenever we go out, I had to pay. Every single time. From a street food to fancy meal.
He subtly used to ask for stuff as ‘gifts’ and slyly asked me once to order something on amazon. He wanted the same thing which I ordered. The order he shamed me for wasting money. When I asked him mode of payment and whether he’s okay with CoD, he had the fucking balls to say that I should pay for it otherwise he doesn’t want it.
He tried to control every single aspect of my life. From my friends to the relationship I have with my family members. He doesn’t like me talking to other guys as he ‘knows’ their intentions. He purposefully ruined my chances with my crush! On top of that he stole my personal pics from my phone when he took my phone on pretext of an emergency.
I have had it enough now !! I gathered strength to come out of this toxic mess I got myself into. I broke off this stupid ‘friendship’. I sense a weird and refreshing relief now, of not having someone on my head 24x7 trying to play me like a video game.
2023.06.06 19:00 sexy-hot-shot Anxiety with Driving Test
22F, wears glasses, zones out (yet to be diagnosed on the 15th)
So I posted awhile ago about my awful experience with a driving lesson (he talked a lot, called my eyes goofy, implied I screwed things up, etc).
But I still decided to go through with it and I'll have my 2nd and last 2-hr lesson with him tomorrow. I think I'm kinda having anxiety now because I know he'll be condescending again and will think I'm dumb. I know, my fault for still going through with it but I thought I'm halfway in. I could endure another 2 hr with him and I already paid.
What could help for me to focus while driving? I get anxiety in general about it, but moreso now because of the awful instructor. And please wish me luck he allows me to take the drive test right away 🙈
Thank you all 💞
submitted by sexy-hot-shot to ADHD [link] [comments]
So I posted awhile ago about my awful experience with a driving lesson (he talked a lot, called my eyes goofy, implied I screwed things up, etc).
But I still decided to go through with it and I'll have my 2nd and last 2-hr lesson with him tomorrow. I think I'm kinda having anxiety now because I know he'll be condescending again and will think I'm dumb. I know, my fault for still going through with it but I thought I'm halfway in. I could endure another 2 hr with him and I already paid.
What could help for me to focus while driving? I get anxiety in general about it, but moreso now because of the awful instructor. And please wish me luck he allows me to take the drive test right away 🙈
Thank you all 💞
2023.06.06 18:59 NerdWithACar Day one, for the 4th time.
Hey there, so I’m a 30yr old male (31 on June 8th), 5’11”, and I’m sitting at 305lbs. I am NOT happy with my quality of life, but I told myself that 2023 was my year to turn it around.
Im a stress eater, so this is difficult for me but it works! But I have been snacking a lot recently because my wife and I are moving into her parents basement, I’m getting my GED, then I’m going to be going to school to get my ADN to become a Registered Nurse. I have tried to start IF multiple times in the past, and just fall of the train after a few weeks. That happened again early this year, I was strong for 3 weeks, lost 10lbs and then stopped. But, I have maintained and haven’t gained anything.
I’m doing 16/8, my job is physically demanding already as I work in a parts warehouse for diesel truck parts. But I do plan on getting a workout routine in place where I do something at least 3 times a week to start.
My goals for losing this weight is so that when my wife and I decide to have kids, I’ll be able to keep up with them. Also, going to be a nurse, I’d like to be able to keep up with my daily duties and not be dead by the end of the day.
You guys are always such a lift to my spirits when I get to come check out y’all’s progress. I’m hoping to be able to post mine! I’m just not confident enough right now to post pictures of me. 😬 I hope to get to know some of y’all soon!
Any advice to help me keep on it is welcome!
submitted by NerdWithACar to intermittentfasting [link] [comments]
Im a stress eater, so this is difficult for me but it works! But I have been snacking a lot recently because my wife and I are moving into her parents basement, I’m getting my GED, then I’m going to be going to school to get my ADN to become a Registered Nurse. I have tried to start IF multiple times in the past, and just fall of the train after a few weeks. That happened again early this year, I was strong for 3 weeks, lost 10lbs and then stopped. But, I have maintained and haven’t gained anything.
I’m doing 16/8, my job is physically demanding already as I work in a parts warehouse for diesel truck parts. But I do plan on getting a workout routine in place where I do something at least 3 times a week to start.
My goals for losing this weight is so that when my wife and I decide to have kids, I’ll be able to keep up with them. Also, going to be a nurse, I’d like to be able to keep up with my daily duties and not be dead by the end of the day.
You guys are always such a lift to my spirits when I get to come check out y’all’s progress. I’m hoping to be able to post mine! I’m just not confident enough right now to post pictures of me. 😬 I hope to get to know some of y’all soon!
Any advice to help me keep on it is welcome!
2023.06.06 18:59 confusedfeelingss Debating reaching out to my abuser
So when I (30m) was about 14 a woman in her 20’s would have sex with me. For a long time, I thought of these experiences as great because as a 14 year old boy, having sex with an older woman was the ultimate fantasy.
As I’ve grown up and spoken to a therapist, it’s come to light that these experiences may be one of the roots of my hypersexuality, porn and sex addiction and a limitless mind in terms of kinks and fetishes. Which while all have lead to fun at points, has also lead to a lot of distress mentally and very dark thoughts, leading to suicidal ideations.
I was curious to see if I could find her on Facebook all these years later and sure enough I did. Now comes the dilemma, I had thought about reaching out to her and telling her what she did was wrong and has left me with lasting damage. I have no interest and n outting her publicly or trying to ruin her life, just that what she did lead to me suffering. But as soon as I clicked on her profile, all those “fun” memories came flooding back and I found myself wanting to play with her again and rather than tell her what she did messed me up, I have the urge to tell her it arouses me to know she took advantage of me. I know this probably isn’t the healthiest response.
Now I’m stuck debating what I should do. Is it even worth reaching out to her at all? This all happened more than a decade and a half ago and I’m concerned that me opening that door again won’t give me closure but instead lead me to downplaying and potentially roleplaying my abuse with my abuser.
I’m a little all over the place with this so I was hoping to hear some of your thoughts on what I should do or similar experiences and how they went for you. If you prefer to discuss this in private, I’m open to dm’s as well.
submitted by confusedfeelingss to Molested [link] [comments]
As I’ve grown up and spoken to a therapist, it’s come to light that these experiences may be one of the roots of my hypersexuality, porn and sex addiction and a limitless mind in terms of kinks and fetishes. Which while all have lead to fun at points, has also lead to a lot of distress mentally and very dark thoughts, leading to suicidal ideations.
I was curious to see if I could find her on Facebook all these years later and sure enough I did. Now comes the dilemma, I had thought about reaching out to her and telling her what she did was wrong and has left me with lasting damage. I have no interest and n outting her publicly or trying to ruin her life, just that what she did lead to me suffering. But as soon as I clicked on her profile, all those “fun” memories came flooding back and I found myself wanting to play with her again and rather than tell her what she did messed me up, I have the urge to tell her it arouses me to know she took advantage of me. I know this probably isn’t the healthiest response.
Now I’m stuck debating what I should do. Is it even worth reaching out to her at all? This all happened more than a decade and a half ago and I’m concerned that me opening that door again won’t give me closure but instead lead me to downplaying and potentially roleplaying my abuse with my abuser.
I’m a little all over the place with this so I was hoping to hear some of your thoughts on what I should do or similar experiences and how they went for you. If you prefer to discuss this in private, I’m open to dm’s as well.
2023.06.06 18:59 _Triple_ [STORE] 900+ KNIVES/GLOVES/SKINS, 50.000$+ INVENTORY. M9 Fade, M4 Poseidon, BFK Freehand, Crimson Kimono, Nomad Fade, Skeleton, Kara Lore, Bayo Autotronic, AWP Fade, Kara Damas, BFK Ultra, Kara Freehand, Kara Bright, M9 Damas, Omega, Tiger Strike, Flip MF, Bayo Tiger, Deagle Blaze, Talon & More
Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory
Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.
All Buyouts are listed in cash value.
KNIVES
★ Butterfly Knife Freehand FN #1, B/O: $2500
★ Butterfly Knife Ultraviolet FT, B/O: $822
★ Butterfly Knife Scorched FT, B/O: $616
⎯★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth MW #1, B/O: $1300
★ Bayonet Autotronic FN, B/O: $1050
★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth MW, B/O: $629
★ Bayonet Bright Water FT, B/O: $326
★ Bayonet Safari Mesh BS, B/O: $233
⎯★ Karambit Lore FT, B/O: $1110
★ Karambit Damascus Steel FT, B/O: $840
★ Karambit Freehand MW, B/O: $784
★ Karambit Bright Water MW, B/O: $759
⎯★ M9 Bayonet Fade FN, B/O: $1801
★ M9 Bayonet Fade FN, B/O: $1801
★ M9 Bayonet Damascus Steel FN, B/O: $751
⎯★ Nomad Knife Fade FN, B/O: $1156
★ Nomad Knife Slaughter MW, B/O: $544
★ Nomad Knife Blue Steel WW, B/O: $318
⎯★ Flip Knife Marble Fade FN, B/O: $646
★ Flip Knife Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $574
★ Flip Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 1) MW, B/O: $552
★ Flip Knife Case Hardened FT, B/O: $257
★ Flip Knife Freehand FT, B/O: $255
★ StatTrak™ Flip Knife Bright Water FN, B/O: $287
⎯★ Huntsman Knife Lore FN, B/O: $461
★ Huntsman Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $436
★ Huntsman Knife Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $353
★ Huntsman Knife Autotronic FT, B/O: $212
★ Huntsman Knife Bright Water FT, B/O: $129
★ Huntsman Knife Forest DDPAT MW, B/O: $129
★ Huntsman Knife Forest DDPAT BS, B/O: $123
★ StatTrak™ Huntsman Knife Rust Coat BS, B/O: $127
⎯★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 2) FN, B/O: $375
★ Bowie Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $363
★ Bowie Knife Tiger Tooth FN, B/O: $269
★ Bowie Knife Crimson Web WW, B/O: $192
★ Bowie Knife Bright Water FN, B/O: $159
★ Bowie Knife Ultraviolet FT, B/O: $126
⎯★ Stiletto Knife Slaughter FN, B/O: $616
★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web FT, B/O: $412
★ StatTrak™ Stiletto Knife Night Stripe FT, B/O: $227
⎯★ Falchion Knife Lore FT, B/O: $214
★ Falchion Knife Autotronic FT, B/O: $192
★ Falchion Knife Scorched WW, B/O: $105
⎯★ Survival Knife Crimson Web BS, B/O: $216
★ Survival Knife Case Hardened FT, B/O: $198
★ Survival Knife Scorched FT, B/O: $111
⎯★ Shadow Daggers Fade FN, B/O: $368
★ Shadow Daggers Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $228
★ Shadow Daggers, B/O: $201
★ Shadow Daggers Damascus Steel FT, B/O: $108
★ Shadow Daggers Ultraviolet FT, B/O: $105
★ Shadow Daggers Black Laminate FT, B/O: $99
★ Shadow Daggers Forest DDPAT FT, B/O: $85
⎯★ Gut Knife Doppler (Sapphire) MW #1, B/O: $1700
★ Gut Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $223
★ Gut Knife Marble Fade FN, B/O: $203
★ Gut Knife Doppler (Phase 2) FN, B/O: $191
★ Gut Knife Case Hardened BS, B/O: $127
⎯★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $199
★ Navaja Knife Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $199
★ Navaja Knife, B/O: $138
★ Navaja Knife Damascus Steel FN, B/O: $111
⎯★ Classic Knife Urban Masked FT, B/O: $146
★ StatTrak™ Classic Knife Stained BS, B/O: $168
⎯★ Ursus Knife Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $476
★ Ursus Knife, B/O: $375
⎯★ Skeleton Knife, B/O: $1137
★ Talon Knife, B/O: $608
★ Paracord Knife, B/O: $305
★ Survival Knife Forest DDPAT FT, B/O: $97
GLOVES
★ Moto Gloves Transport MW, B/O: $204
★ Moto Gloves Polygon BS, B/O: $142
★ Moto Gloves Blood Pressure BS, B/O: $84
★ Moto Gloves Blood Pressure BS, B/O: $84
★ Moto Gloves 3rd Commando Company BS, B/O: $63
★ Moto Gloves 3rd Commando Company BS, B/O: $63
⎯★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Kimono WW, B/O: $1215
★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike FT, B/O: $672
★ Specialist Gloves Lt. Commander FT, B/O: $305
★ Specialist Gloves Lt. Commander BS, B/O: $140
★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web BS, B/O: $137
★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot FT, B/O: $75
⎯★ Driver Gloves Crimson Weave FT, B/O: $359
★ Driver Gloves Imperial Plaid BS, B/O: $229
★ Driver Gloves Overtake BS, B/O: $77
★ Driver Gloves Racing Green FT, B/O: $48
⎯★ Sport Gloves Omega FT, B/O: $739
★ Sport Gloves Amphibious BS #2, B/O: $733
★ Sport Gloves Arid BS, B/O: $292
⎯★ Hand Wraps Giraffe MW, B/O: $212
★ Hand Wraps Leather FT, B/O: $160
★ Hand Wraps Desert Shamagh MW, B/O: $101
⎯★ Broken Fang Gloves Yellow-banded MW, B/O: $185
★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point FT, B/O: $67
★ Broken Fang Gloves Needle Point WW, B/O: $59
⎯★ Hydra Gloves Case Hardened BS, B/O: $65
★ Hydra Gloves Emerald FT, B/O: $65
★ Hydra Gloves Emerald BS, B/O: $62
WEAPONS
AK-47 Case Hardened BS, B/O: $130
AK-47 Bloodsport MW, B/O: $79
AK-47 Fuel Injector BS, B/O: $76
AK-47 Fuel Injector BS, B/O: $76
AK-47 Bloodsport FT, B/O: $70
AK-47 Neon Rider MW, B/O: $60
StatTrak™ AK-47 Aquamarine Revenge FT, B/O: $72
⎯AWP Fade FN, B/O: $1039
AWP Asiimov FT, B/O: $139
AWP Asiimov FT, B/O: $139
AWP Wildfire MW, B/O: $95
AWP BOOM MW, B/O: $93
AWP BOOM MW, B/O: $93
AWP Duality FN, B/O: $81
AWP Asiimov BS, B/O: $79
AWP Asiimov BS, B/O: $79
AWP Chromatic Aberration FN, B/O: $60
StatTrak™ AWP Hyper Beast FT, B/O: $68
StatTrak™ AWP Hyper Beast FT, B/O: $68
StatTrak™ AWP Electric Hive FT, B/O: $55
⎯Desert Eagle Blaze FN, B/O: $623
Desert Eagle Emerald Jörmungandr FN, B/O: $241
Desert Eagle Cobalt Disruption FN, B/O: $81
Desert Eagle Cobalt Disruption FN, B/O: $81
Desert Eagle Cobalt Disruption FN, B/O: $81
Desert Eagle Printstream FT, B/O: $54
⎯M4A1-S Blue Phosphor FN, B/O: $434
StatTrak™ M4A1-S Bright Water MW, B/O: $55
⎯M4A4 Poseidon FN, B/O: $1465
M4A4 Asiimov BS, B/O: $55
M4A4 Hellfire MW, B/O: $50
⎯USP-S Kill Confirmed MW, B/O: $72
USP-S Printstream FT, B/O: $69
StatTrak™ USP-S Kill Confirmed FT, B/O: $139
⎯AUG Flame Jörmungandr FN, B/O: $234
P90 Run and Hide FT, B/O: $147
Five-SeveN Candy Apple FN, B/O: $61
Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory
Some items on the list may no longer be available or are still locked, visit My Inventory for more details.
Send a Trade Offer for fastest response. I consider all offers.
Add me for discuss if there is a serious offer that needs to be discussed.
2023.06.06 18:59 Aggressive_Memory136 My husband SA'd me, 2 years later I feel like I still haven't even started healing
As the title states, my husband(30m) sexually assaulted me(30f) 2 years ago by coercing me into sex, then violating me in ways he knew would hurt. I was crying for him to stop, but he finished regardless....after the whole thing, he said he was sorry, realized that what he had just done was messed up, and promised me he would go to therapy to fix his sexual issues.
After 2 weeks, he tried to justify himself saying it wasn't assault because I agreed to the sex (after being treated like shit for originally saying no, I caved to sex). This set off a string of martial issues. After another 3 months, I realized I couldn't live feeling as broken as I was, so I started seeing a therapist. I've been seeing her for nearly a year and a half.
I was hoping that by healing and moving forward, I could try to start healing my marriage, all in hopes that he could start working on his issues as well as I was working on mine, then we could both come together for marriage counseling.
Now, I guess to the main issue, despite my therapy, I feel I've been pushed to square one more times than I can count. I still get anxious having my husband touching me (in any way, even hugs), but then I feel whenever I start making progress, he's asking for sex, and that just triggers me, and puts me mack to not trusting him. Also, he hasn't even tried to look for therapy until about 2 months ago, and now every time I've asked what he's done to help heal the relationship, all he brings up is how he's in therapy and working on it, like that's been enough for 2 years of trauma.
So, I guess to the main point of all of this, I know my situation is probably a lot different than most. I have been trying so hard to get past this, but I feel like I just can't seem to move forward in healing. It's to a point that my husband wants a divorce because he feels like I've just held this incident over his head and refuse to see his progress, and he's just done trying.
I want to know if there are others who may have gone through something similar, and how they might have moved forward from the sexual assault of a partner. If it's even possible to start rebuilding the trust at all.
submitted by Aggressive_Memory136 to sexualassault [link] [comments]
After 2 weeks, he tried to justify himself saying it wasn't assault because I agreed to the sex (after being treated like shit for originally saying no, I caved to sex). This set off a string of martial issues. After another 3 months, I realized I couldn't live feeling as broken as I was, so I started seeing a therapist. I've been seeing her for nearly a year and a half.
I was hoping that by healing and moving forward, I could try to start healing my marriage, all in hopes that he could start working on his issues as well as I was working on mine, then we could both come together for marriage counseling.
Now, I guess to the main issue, despite my therapy, I feel I've been pushed to square one more times than I can count. I still get anxious having my husband touching me (in any way, even hugs), but then I feel whenever I start making progress, he's asking for sex, and that just triggers me, and puts me mack to not trusting him. Also, he hasn't even tried to look for therapy until about 2 months ago, and now every time I've asked what he's done to help heal the relationship, all he brings up is how he's in therapy and working on it, like that's been enough for 2 years of trauma.
So, I guess to the main point of all of this, I know my situation is probably a lot different than most. I have been trying so hard to get past this, but I feel like I just can't seem to move forward in healing. It's to a point that my husband wants a divorce because he feels like I've just held this incident over his head and refuse to see his progress, and he's just done trying.
I want to know if there are others who may have gone through something similar, and how they might have moved forward from the sexual assault of a partner. If it's even possible to start rebuilding the trust at all.
2023.06.06 18:59 FrancesRW Anyone else have trouble quitting, even though you want to?
LO is 8 months. Pumping has this strange hold on me. I told myself I would let myself quit at six months. I have two kids now, and it’s a lot to keep up with, especially with a toddler running around. I didn’t quite feel ready at 6 months, but I did reduce my number of pumps from 4, to 3, to 2 a day. Once I dropped to two, my supply, completely plummeted, and now I only make about 7 ounces a day. For weeks, I felt extremely guilty for dropping from 3 to 2. Even though I only make 7 ounces a day now, I feel really guilty about stopping! I hate pumping, and part of me really wants to stop, but guilt holds me back.
Anyone else go through this? How did you handle? How did you give yourself permission to stop pumping when you really wanted to stop, but felt really guilty?
submitted by FrancesRW to ExclusivelyPumping [link] [comments]
Anyone else go through this? How did you handle? How did you give yourself permission to stop pumping when you really wanted to stop, but felt really guilty?
2023.06.06 18:59 Trying2BeN0rmal Some Malphite tips thread.
I have 600 games on malphite, mostly as a tank.
I'll give you some advice that I don't see many Malphite players do, be tricky.
What I mean by this is, say your jungle is coming. Do not walk towards the enemy because he might run, especially if he noticed that you've been playing passive all game and now all of a sudden you're walking straight towards him.
You want to walk 🚶♂️ like you're minding your own business, until your jungle is in range and then ult.
Another mistake I see Malphites make when they're 1v1 is beginning the fight with their ult. If they're not in kill range or your jungler isn't nearly, this is a waste.
What you want to do is spend some time chipping him down and then start a fight and act like you're backing off but don't allow him to just get free hits in. Back off to allow your cool downs to reset and as soon as they do ult and do you're combo with agnite.
I hope my tips helped, I'm not the best at writing nor at putting my thoughts into words. Please feel free to add your own tips.
submitted by Trying2BeN0rmal to wildrift [link] [comments]
I'll give you some advice that I don't see many Malphite players do, be tricky.
What I mean by this is, say your jungle is coming. Do not walk towards the enemy because he might run, especially if he noticed that you've been playing passive all game and now all of a sudden you're walking straight towards him.
You want to walk 🚶♂️ like you're minding your own business, until your jungle is in range and then ult.
Another mistake I see Malphites make when they're 1v1 is beginning the fight with their ult. If they're not in kill range or your jungler isn't nearly, this is a waste.
What you want to do is spend some time chipping him down and then start a fight and act like you're backing off but don't allow him to just get free hits in. Back off to allow your cool downs to reset and as soon as they do ult and do you're combo with agnite.
I hope my tips helped, I'm not the best at writing nor at putting my thoughts into words. Please feel free to add your own tips.
2023.06.06 18:59 Potential-Pen-5753 Should I stop cold turkey? (300mg XL)
I've been taking 300 mg XL for a year and the side effects are getting worst (mostly really bad motor tics). In the las month I've been taking it every other day to see if it get's better but it's not really helping. So I was supposed to take yesterday since I didn't the day before and I just forgot about it. Today would be my third day whitout taking my dose, I was just wandering if would be a good idea just not take anymore since I'm already off for a few days. Yesterday I just felt a little down and some headache, but nothing too bad. If I just stop taking it today the side effects will get much more worst then the first days?
Talking to a doctor it's not a option right now and I don't want to wait another month to taper off if that's possible. I would need to even get a prescription to get the 150mg. Everything is pointing to me stoping cold turkey but I'm afraid of the side effects and how long could it last
submitted by Potential-Pen-5753 to bupropion [link] [comments]
Talking to a doctor it's not a option right now and I don't want to wait another month to taper off if that's possible. I would need to even get a prescription to get the 150mg. Everything is pointing to me stoping cold turkey but I'm afraid of the side effects and how long could it last
2023.06.06 18:59 C_tha_shocker Career advice for upskilling in ML/DE
I have been a Software Engineer for about 2 years, I got my B.S. and M.S. in IT. I can build applications, web-apps, and understand problem-solving to a good level. But not having a pure CS background causes a lot of struggle in areas that are heavily science-based. Right now I work as a ML/Data Engineer, and even though I can get my work done, it takes me longer than my peers that have a strong CS background. I am wondering if I should go back and get an actual CS degree or just try to study, to fill the gaps. I could switch jobs, but this underlying weakness will still be present and introduce issues in the feature.
submitted by C_tha_shocker to cscareerquestions [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 18:59 TruckRevolutionary64 Im (19F) thinking about contacting my bf’s (20M) cousin for the first time.
My bf has been stonewalling/ignoring me for 4 days now out of the blue after I got upset at him for not keeping his promise on prioritizing time with me.
We just became long distance around two weeks ago until September. He’s going to spend his summer working for family/friends and since March had begun to distance himself from social media which I’m fully supportive of since it’s healthy. Though we were close distance so it wasn’t that big of a deal then. But two days before he “disappeared” I’d communicate with him how I’d appreciate more time with him, though he’d always be tired after his busy day.
The thing is he’ll come back from work and family and go straight to gaming, leaving little time to talk with me by the time he became tired.
I got upset by this since the day before this message was sent he said he promised to hang out with me on call, and on discord I said: “Thanks for keeping your promise. And for ignoring me all day and not bothering to send me a single message on here, Snapchat, Instagram, or msgs after calling you multiple times to just hang out.
You didn’t even bother to update me or say a little” hey hun I’m gonna be busy gonna have to postpone” which I would’ve been bummed out but ultimately just fine”
30 mins later I calmed down and said: “(his name) I don’t know what’s going on, But I’d prefer you tell me instead of shunning me out like this. I’m upset on why you keep on ignoring me. I’m really worried and I have valid reason to be at this point”
“I just wanna talk, what’s going on bub?”
And that was the last of it.
Now it’s been four days and everyone’s told me to stand back and wait for his response, which is what I’ve been doing, but I have an urge to talk to his cousin since he’ll easily get a hold of him. But the thing is I’ve never talked to him before, we only follow eachother on insta and I think it would be weird and rude to just pop out of no where and ask him if he’s okay and about this whole ordeal possibly making things worse.
submitted by TruckRevolutionary64 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
We just became long distance around two weeks ago until September. He’s going to spend his summer working for family/friends and since March had begun to distance himself from social media which I’m fully supportive of since it’s healthy. Though we were close distance so it wasn’t that big of a deal then. But two days before he “disappeared” I’d communicate with him how I’d appreciate more time with him, though he’d always be tired after his busy day.
The thing is he’ll come back from work and family and go straight to gaming, leaving little time to talk with me by the time he became tired.
I got upset by this since the day before this message was sent he said he promised to hang out with me on call, and on discord I said: “Thanks for keeping your promise. And for ignoring me all day and not bothering to send me a single message on here, Snapchat, Instagram, or msgs after calling you multiple times to just hang out.
You didn’t even bother to update me or say a little” hey hun I’m gonna be busy gonna have to postpone” which I would’ve been bummed out but ultimately just fine”
30 mins later I calmed down and said: “(his name) I don’t know what’s going on, But I’d prefer you tell me instead of shunning me out like this. I’m upset on why you keep on ignoring me. I’m really worried and I have valid reason to be at this point”
“I just wanna talk, what’s going on bub?”
And that was the last of it.
Now it’s been four days and everyone’s told me to stand back and wait for his response, which is what I’ve been doing, but I have an urge to talk to his cousin since he’ll easily get a hold of him. But the thing is I’ve never talked to him before, we only follow eachother on insta and I think it would be weird and rude to just pop out of no where and ask him if he’s okay and about this whole ordeal possibly making things worse.
2023.06.06 18:58 d1withdforce Help with accommodation
Does anyone here know anybody who could help me move my position up in the waiting list for accommodation. I’m in India right now and won’t be back till September so can’t even look for a place in dublin. If you know someone who works in residences and would be able to help just let me know. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
submitted by d1withdforce to UCD [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 18:58 confusedfeelingss Debating reaching out to my abuser
So when I (30m) was about 14 a woman in her 20’s would have sex with me. For a long time, I thought of these experiences as great because as a 14 year old boy, having sex with an older woman was the ultimate fantasy.
As I’ve grown up and spoken to a therapist, it’s come to light that these experiences may be one of the roots of my hypersexuality, porn and sex addiction and a limitless mind in terms of kinks and fetishes. Which while all have lead to fun at points, has also lead to a lot of distress mentally and very dark thoughts, leading to suicidal ideations.
I was curious to see if I could find her on Facebook all these years later and sure enough I did. Now comes the dilemma, I had thought about reaching out to her and telling her what she did was wrong and has left me with lasting damage. I have no interest and n outting her publicly or trying to ruin her life, just that what she did lead to me suffering. But as soon as I clicked on her profile, all those “fun” memories came flooding back and I found myself wanting to play with her again and rather than tell her what she did messed me up, I have the urge to tell her it arouses me to know she took advantage of me. I know this probably isn’t the healthiest response.
Now I’m stuck debating what I should do. Is it even worth reaching out to her at all? This all happened more than a decade and a half ago and I’m concerned that me opening that door again won’t give me closure but instead lead me to downplaying and potentially roleplaying my abuse with my abuser.
I’m a little all over the place with this so I was hoping to hear some of your thoughts on what I should do or similar experiences and how they went for you. If you prefer to discuss this in private, I’m open to dm’s as well.
submitted by confusedfeelingss to Molested [link] [comments]
As I’ve grown up and spoken to a therapist, it’s come to light that these experiences may be one of the roots of my hypersexuality, porn and sex addiction and a limitless mind in terms of kinks and fetishes. Which while all have lead to fun at points, has also lead to a lot of distress mentally and very dark thoughts, leading to suicidal ideations.
I was curious to see if I could find her on Facebook all these years later and sure enough I did. Now comes the dilemma, I had thought about reaching out to her and telling her what she did was wrong and has left me with lasting damage. I have no interest and n outting her publicly or trying to ruin her life, just that what she did lead to me suffering. But as soon as I clicked on her profile, all those “fun” memories came flooding back and I found myself wanting to play with her again and rather than tell her what she did messed me up, I have the urge to tell her it arouses me to know she took advantage of me. I know this probably isn’t the healthiest response.
Now I’m stuck debating what I should do. Is it even worth reaching out to her at all? This all happened more than a decade and a half ago and I’m concerned that me opening that door again won’t give me closure but instead lead me to downplaying and potentially roleplaying my abuse with my abuser.
I’m a little all over the place with this so I was hoping to hear some of your thoughts on what I should do or similar experiences and how they went for you. If you prefer to discuss this in private, I’m open to dm’s as well.
2023.06.06 18:58 d1withdforce Help with accommodation
Does anyone here know anybody who could help me move my position up in the waiting list for accommodation. I’m in India right now and won’t be back till September so can’t even look for a place in dublin. If you know someone who works in residences and would be able to help just let me know. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
submitted by d1withdforce to UCD [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 18:58 Keefyfingaz 3 guys get caught poaching animals in the kings courtyard.
The guys are brought before the king to be punished. King says "as your punishment, I want you to go back out into the courtyard and bring me whatever fruit you can find. The guys look at eachother. Easy enough. They get going. Some time passes, and the first guy comes back with 3 apples. The king says "shove all of the apples you found up your ass. If you move, you'll be executed. The guy is scared, but having no choice, proceeds. He manages to get the first one in, but during the second, he winces. SLICE. The executioner lobs his head off. Now the Second guy returns with some berries. Maybe 10. Same deal as before, so the guy gets going. He's on a roll. He's got 7 in there. 8,9, there's one left and then ,out of nowhere, the guy drops to his knees and begins laughing hysterically. The king is perplexed, but SLICE. The executioner cuts his head off. Now the first guy and the second guy meet up in the after life. First guy goes "bro what happened!? I was watching you I thought for sure you had it, what the hell did you do that for?" Second guy says "Maaaan I couldn't help it. I saw the third guy coming with pineapples"
submitted by Keefyfingaz to dadjokes [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 18:58 Sweetcreature_hs Ending episodes for TMKOC that we all deserve.
Hi, so I saw a post here where the OP wrote a climax ending which was cool and amazing but not satisfying. So, I thought of writing an ending which would give us as an audience a closure. Something that we deserve as an audience. You can too add your own story to this ending. Here's how it goes...
The ending which we all deserve, just hear me out.
So, It's Popatlal's wedding time and yes he has finally found the love of his life and it somehow turns out to be Rita Reporter. As they get some kind of case together and both of them go undercover as husband and wife to expose some criminal. And they somehow fall in love and solve the case too. (But keep in mind, during these times the gokuldham society members are not shown.) It's only the case episodes but some scenes are shown of popatlal communicating with the society members on phone.
Now at present, after a month of solving the case Popatlal is getting ready for his wedding but somehow he is kidnapped by the same criminal's family memberas a revenge. And locked up somewhere.
Then Jethalal and other members find out and with the help of Rita Reporter and police try to find Popatlal.
Popatlal is locked up in a warehouse and is kept in the dark. He is talking to the criminal's family and tells them that his family will come to save him. And on cue everyone hears a bang and the door opens and in walks in all the society members with the police. And they are not the society members we expected to walk in. They are all the old original society members. Old sodhi calling out for popu. Old Sonu, old taarak and Anjali, old and original tapu and the whole society with the police. But Daya is somehow missing.
And it's Chalu Pandey who finds Popatlal and solves his first and last Gokuldham society case. And arrest the criminals. And everyone is in tears.As the old members are there. Then the scene cuts to Popatlal getting married to Rita in a venue outside Gokuldham society. And then they all return to gokuldham with band bajha and as they are about to enter the society they see none other than Daya standing with her Maa and Sundar. She starts singing Aaiye padhariye song. Jethalal gets emotional and doesn't wait for her to finish her thing and doesn't care about the society members standing around. He just calls out Daya loudly and sprints to hug her. And then the whole society meets her And then it's the next day and Daya is trying to wake up Jethalal but...
It's getting very long. Do you guys want a part 2?
I know it's cheesy lol but I would love to see a happy ending to our beloved childhood show. Please tell me in the comments what you guys think.
submitted by Sweetcreature_hs to TMKOC [link] [comments]
The ending which we all deserve, just hear me out.
So, It's Popatlal's wedding time and yes he has finally found the love of his life and it somehow turns out to be Rita Reporter. As they get some kind of case together and both of them go undercover as husband and wife to expose some criminal. And they somehow fall in love and solve the case too. (But keep in mind, during these times the gokuldham society members are not shown.) It's only the case episodes but some scenes are shown of popatlal communicating with the society members on phone.
Now at present, after a month of solving the case Popatlal is getting ready for his wedding but somehow he is kidnapped by the same criminal's family memberas a revenge. And locked up somewhere.
Then Jethalal and other members find out and with the help of Rita Reporter and police try to find Popatlal.
Popatlal is locked up in a warehouse and is kept in the dark. He is talking to the criminal's family and tells them that his family will come to save him. And on cue everyone hears a bang and the door opens and in walks in all the society members with the police. And they are not the society members we expected to walk in. They are all the old original society members. Old sodhi calling out for popu. Old Sonu, old taarak and Anjali, old and original tapu and the whole society with the police. But Daya is somehow missing.
And it's Chalu Pandey who finds Popatlal and solves his first and last Gokuldham society case. And arrest the criminals. And everyone is in tears.As the old members are there. Then the scene cuts to Popatlal getting married to Rita in a venue outside Gokuldham society. And then they all return to gokuldham with band bajha and as they are about to enter the society they see none other than Daya standing with her Maa and Sundar. She starts singing Aaiye padhariye song. Jethalal gets emotional and doesn't wait for her to finish her thing and doesn't care about the society members standing around. He just calls out Daya loudly and sprints to hug her. And then the whole society meets her And then it's the next day and Daya is trying to wake up Jethalal but...
It's getting very long. Do you guys want a part 2?
I know it's cheesy lol but I would love to see a happy ending to our beloved childhood show. Please tell me in the comments what you guys think.
2023.06.06 18:58 BlueLobster040 Did Viagra cause my ED
I have hade problems with ED for some time now and i have used Viagra for the last 2-3 months. Before using Viagra i had some troubles maintaining an erection but after using it a couple of times i stopped getting erections completely. Last week i had a sudden rise of horniness and good erections and had sex 4 times in 5 days with No troubles. Then i took Viagra and my libido and erection quality dipped down to nearly 0. Can the Viagra have caused my ed ?
submitted by BlueLobster040 to erectiledysfunction [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 18:58 deckmcdeckington Finished radiation!... but now I have radiation pneumonitis?! Anyone else go through this?
Had 15 days of radiation to neck/chest following 4 rounds of chemo for stage 2 hodgkins. After 10 radiation sessions my throat/esophagus was very sore and at its worse (dr gave me a low dose liquid morphine to help with pain) but started to feel better after that. I finished radiation and was so happy that life could start getting back to normal!... Now 1 week after I finished my lungs hurt to breath and get a full breath so I’m basically useless again! I’m disappointed because I thought that radiation would be a breeze and I could finally start going for more walks and participating around the house more. Anyone else go through this? How long did it last?
submitted by deckmcdeckington to lymphoma [link] [comments]
2023.06.06 18:58 BoiledForYourSins Anyone else experience internal tremors?
So I'm 46M and have 36% EF since last August. Started with arterial flutter as well but that went away on its own after a month. I have normal weight, stay active, good diet, normal HR and BP, no adema. I've been on Eliquis, metoprolol, lozartan, lasix, and statin. I had a MUGA scan last week and EF was still 37%. Zero improvement. No genetic history of heart failure, no idea yet as the cause of low EF
I started to feel so much better by November but then in December I started having weird "episodes" where I would wake up feeling like my arms and legs were shaking, I'd be disoriented/confused/experienced memory loss/brain foggy, and feel absolutely exhausted. This would last from several minutes to three days. I've missed a lot of work since then. Did a 3 day then a 30 day Holter monitor which didn't show anything significant. These episodes have become more frequent and more severe and last night it woke me in the night. I felt like I was shivering so bad inside my arms and legs but they weren't moving. Im sitting here now feeling like my whole body is shaking on the inside. I've been waiting on a neurology referral for over two fucking months. I feel like this is not a heart failure issue and something worse that is maybe causing the depressed EF. But I'm curious if anyone else with low EF has experienced anything like this?
submitted by BoiledForYourSins to Heartfailure [link] [comments]
I started to feel so much better by November but then in December I started having weird "episodes" where I would wake up feeling like my arms and legs were shaking, I'd be disoriented/confused/experienced memory loss/brain foggy, and feel absolutely exhausted. This would last from several minutes to three days. I've missed a lot of work since then. Did a 3 day then a 30 day Holter monitor which didn't show anything significant. These episodes have become more frequent and more severe and last night it woke me in the night. I felt like I was shivering so bad inside my arms and legs but they weren't moving. Im sitting here now feeling like my whole body is shaking on the inside. I've been waiting on a neurology referral for over two fucking months. I feel like this is not a heart failure issue and something worse that is maybe causing the depressed EF. But I'm curious if anyone else with low EF has experienced anything like this?